Walking On Broken Glass
by GoldRuby
Summary: Sakura loses her entire family in a young age thus having to live with her stepfather. Treated as a servant in her own home she thrives to live. A cold 'evil' step brother Syaoran and his dangerous love for Sakura that grew from hatred..through the years
1. Chapter 1: Introduction :updated:

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Chapter 1 : Introduction

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Fairytales. A dangerous disease that is cast upon children everyday.

A disease. A hoax. A lie that hides them and covers them from the harshness of reality. Hence, the children are left oblivious and clueless. Stories of deception consisting of princesses, princes, dragons, glass shoes, dwarfs, witches and fairies… As we grow older this dawns to us that reality is far from a mere storybook. Much Much more deadly and much more evil than a wicked witch or dragon…

Yet.

Everyday, all of us dream of a world of fairytales. Where we are the princesses and princes… and where everyone is happy and everyone lives happily ever after.

Cinderella… was my favourite bedtime story. Okaa-san used to read it for me every night when I was young… It is now my most hated story… a story that I dare not to touch.

Reality is a completely different dimension to stories in fairytales… yet… many live in one, and never notice. Except these fairytales doesn't start happily…or end happily. Nor is the princess the most beautiful, kind and fairest of the town. Nor is the prince the most charming and heroic man of the town…if there is one at all.

No. There were no fairy godmothers or glass slippers in my life. I for one thing, wasn't exceptionally beautiful or exceptionally outstanding at singing and dancing… nor am I kind-hearted or the fairest.

I know some resemblance though.

Like Cinderella, My whole family passed away when I was young- thus I was left alone in this cruel world…alone.

Like Cinderella, However, I had a stepfather, He for one thing has never done anything wrong to me…nor has he ever looked at me or spoken to me.

Like Cinderella, but not really like Cinderella, I had an evil step _brother_. Syaoran Li.

Well... I had always secretly named him that. He must probably been the biggest fault of my life. And I admit. I was scared of him. Very. Very scared.

I'm not going to say anything like "This is my story" because this is not a story at all; nor a fairytale. This is neither a diary nor a diary entry. I can just say… I'll just say this is my thoughts and ponders I have.

Well. Hello? I'm Sakura. Sakura Kinomoto. I am about to tell you some of the darkest secrets of my life. Full of betrayal, tragedy, survival, money, gambling and love. Well. Not really gambling- but it gives a good effect right?  
I had decided to write my tears on paper- and let the tears run down the page.

Well here goes. Back to 7 years ago…back to when I was 10…back to when my family was alive. In a warm cozy home in Tomoeda…on a cold night of November 24th 1999…


	2. Chapter 2: Just Another Day :updated:

Hello : ) Lalalaal I'm Phinnie (flops ears about. YES. I HAVE FLOPPY EARS WEWTTT!) and this is Komomo-chan (bounces around with bunny tail). Yoroshiku minna-san!!! (smile)-------- (heart)

**Otou-san Dad**

**Okaa-san Mom**

**Oni-san Big Brother**

**Disclaimer btw. **

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Chapter 2 : Just another day

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"-and they all lived happily ever after. The End." Otou-san closed the book and tucked me into bed. 

It's cold today.

That's cos' winter is coming.

But I'm so excited cos' snow will fall in Tomoeda! Just like last year and the year before that. When snow comes I'm going to make big snowmen nearly as big as otou-san. Then Then we're going to have a big Christmas tree and hang our wish cards on the top!

And And On Christmas, Santa is going to come!! I'm so excited!! I really really reallyyy wanted the new gundam model series (HAHAHAH SAKURA IS A 9 YEAR OLD OTAKU)

I think I've been quite a good girl this year. I've only cried a couple of times.

But… It's not going to be the same though. Not without okaa-san. Otou-san says that Okaa-san is missing me too. I don't understand why I can't see Okaa-san anymore. One day, she was just gone. I cried a lot that day I remember… but I don't really want to talk about it.

Otou-san says I might get to meet Okaa-san sometime later in um… somewhere called H..a...ng... Ka..ng. What a strange name. . Like that scary big gorilla video, oni-san was watching last week.

Anyways I'm so excited. I haven't seen okaa-san since last year and I miss her so much…

"Stop talking to yourself and go to sleep kaijuu :P you're mouth might wake up the whole world" says my oh-so-annoying brother of mine.  
Aww I better go to sleep then! Tomorrow Oni-san and Otou-san and me are going to the Tomoeda Temple to put up wishes and visit our ancestors. Off to sleep.

…

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_I wish my mom came back _

_I wish my mom came back_

_I wish my mom came back_

_I wish…_

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"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M LATE." a 17 year old Sakura woke groggily.

_Damn it. Another stupid dream… what's wrong with me these days... _

She jumped into her uniform – a simple white short-sleeve blouse and a dark grey skort (skirtshort). While brushing her silky auburn hair as she crammed her socks into her feet she hopped into the bathroom. (um yeah I do that)

So. This is another day of my life. As Sakura Li. I live in a huge mansion in Stanely.

Yep, Stanley, the place in Hong Kong that most rich-asses like me lives.

Well.

I'm not really rich. Actually, I'm probably the most poorest I guess. Mmm. How do I explain this? Well. I live with my step-father and step-brother, oh and a lot of the maids and servants. I have never called them "father" and never ever ever "brother" in my whole life. I called my step-father "Mr. Li" and my step-brother well his name. This is because I am the ever-hated child that no one wants.

Which is completely fine. I've put up with it the last 7 years and it's been all good.

Well. Not really.

It's been quite difficult actually, painful sometimes. I had to learn a new language. Thank god not Chinese. English actually. Oblivious to the rest of the world, Hong Kong is an international city where English and Chinese is balanced as a main language- and where Chinese is my worst subject. (truly)

But... where is _my_ family? Well. They're all in heaven at the moment- and hopefully looking out for me. It was quite a blow actually when my whole family left me in this scary world all myself in that small age of 10.

I'm not going to go to the emotional details cos' then I'd be late for school and the family-driver will leave me behind. I'm serious. No-one liked my attendance when I first appeared on their doorstep, and some still don't, except for the few maids I've befriended through the years. Not that I've done anything to them, for them to hate me (I hope o.o)…I think it's my very _existence_. Hm.

Oh.

Especially Syaoran Li. Have I told you about him yet?

Well… He's my 'evil' step brother. And when I say evil I mean it. He's haunted most of my childhood. And not a very happy childhood it was.

Firstly, I wasn't really used to the fact that everyone called each other in their first names in English. It was strange then- now its strange why I thought it was strange. In Japanese customs, calling someone by the first name would mean that you were either family, a couple or a very close friends. Syaoran didn't want to see me or hear me, so the name-thing wasn't much of a problem.

Anyways- I better skip breakfast.

I'll get some from the school canteen later.

I take a ride from Syaoran's private driver. Well of course, at first Syaoran and the driver completly rejected the idea, but since Mr Li had said that it would be suspicious if, I, the 'cousin', rode a vehicle separately; I happily invited myself into Syaoran's private car.

Syaoran might run off without me. I bet that stiff-butt would!

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(Syaoran's POV) 

"Damn it that dumbass is late again. Jeeeesus- can't she learn anything into her thick head? God. I'm always late cos' of her" I mumbled as I messed up my messed up hair once more.

I hate mornings.

THUMP THUMP THUMP OWWW. Yep. She's here. She hasn't hurt herself AGAIN?. …

"I'm so sorry Syaoran! I think my alarm clock wasn't working. I will never do it again. I promise promise promise. I'm really really sorry I really-" the brainless said. "Shut up" I inturupted- She shut, and with that we drove off the main gates.

Sakura Li.

At school, she is known as a so-called "cousin" of mine. The man I'm supposed to call "dad" declared that we would make a bad expression if they knew her real identity.

Such an ugly disgusting identity of hers. And such an ugly face too. An identity I've hated and still hate… An identity of being the daughter of an unfaithful wife and her Japanese husband. A daughter of a secret mistress of my 'dad', a dangerous affair that ended too soon… Since then, I was lead to believe that "Love" was non-existant.

Until I met Sakura Kinomoto.

A girl I resolved to ruin the life of… to taunt and remind her of what unworthy vermin she and her whore mother was... How unworthy her existence was compared to mine…

But…

Somehow something backfired and something worse happened. I was planning to drive her crazy until she ran away somewhere and never came back... I would have been more than happy to kick her ass back to where she came from…

**_That is…If Only I didn't fall hopelessly in love with her._**

**Yes. I am in love with my own step-sister…**

_Damn. _

* * *

Well. I know its REALLY short. But this is the START. gomen nasai!!!! And I just had to end here. Cos I like here. Hurhur. Writing 3rd chap up. Dumdeedum. 


	3. Chapter 3:In The Beginning :updated:

I would like to add that time shifts are very frequent in this. And that most of Sakura's story is based on her earlier years than the present. This is pretty much showing HOW Syaoran grew to fall in love with Sakura.

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Chapter 3

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In The Beginning

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"**Go Away. I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU. NO ONE wants you here. Go back to where you came from… With your stupid ugly face and whore mom. YOU DISGUST ME. GO AWAY." **

Those were the exact first words Syaoran had said to me… the first few words I learnt in English. I did not understand what he was saying…but I could see the blazing fire full of pure hatred in his fierce amber eyes, and I knew.

I was not wanted here.

This would never be my home.

I cannot lie and tell you that my life had been all happy and cheery.

Neither can I tell you, dear reader, that I have been brave and courageous, I cannot lie and tell you that not a single tear has escaped my pit-less eyes.

But I _can _tell you that I _have _survived, and that the peace after the storm, and after another storm, and after another storm… was all part of life...

I did not fully understand why I was there. Why I took an airplane for the first time of life…without oni-san and otou-san at my side… I did not understand how I had ended up in a foreign country, without a clue of where I was, or who I was to this world.

That time…I did not understand why I could never see them again. I was scared, but not sad. Maybe the whole concept did not fully hit me, or maybe, I did not want to know.

I remembered the voices that surrounded me… the tears and the sorrows… the pity and grief in everyone's watery eyes as they stared pityfully down at me.

"Oh you poor poor little girl"

Was I really?

These words repeated again and again, in my ears and in my mind- scorching my heart with its sorrowful plight. I did not understand why I was poor.  
I did not ask. I did not speak at all. "Where is my otou-san?" the words ringed in my head, but the words refused to come out, for a second, I have forgotten how to speak.

Maybe, I did not want to know.

I was surrounded by many people, some who stopped in front of me- attacking me with the same pitiful resonance lingering in their sympathetic "poor poor girl" and those who passed by me awkwardly, avoiding the presence of a 'cursed girl who lost her remaining family.'. There were so many people… yet, I felt alone. As if walls of invisible bricks had cast upon and wrapped me in its cement.

A lady of no face, a face of shadows, led me to a ground. These grounds I have never seen- yet heard of, many a time in countless ghost stories. The graveyard.

She led me towards a stone.

No.

Two stones.

And there…

**R.I.P**

**Here lies Kinomoto, Fujitaka  
Died on November 25th 1999**

**Loving son, Father and friend.**

**R.I.P**

**Here lies Kinomoto, Touya  
Died on November 25th 1999**

**Loving Son, Brother and friend**

I still did not understand.

Or maybe I did.

But did not want to know.

Or believe.

I was scared…  
For the first time of my life.

I was alone.

Where was otou-san..?  
Where was oni-san…?

Where was okaa-san…?  
Where was I?

I was alone…

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"Lazy Bitch, wake up. We're at school and you're snoring your sorry butt" heard a gruffly voice, and then an impact shove on my left arm.

Okay. Maybe I'm not alone now. Now. I have the _ever-wanted_ company of Mr. I've-got-problems himself.

I woke up groggily, rubbing my eyes. _Another dream... _I stared blankly at Syaoran's arm shaking mine.

It's amazing how I even put up with his abuse through these years.

I actually remember the time when we were 12, when he cut off my long hair into a near buzz cut the day I had a first hang-out with my crush. And those times he locked me in a broom closet for 3 hours until a maid found me- oh and those times he locked me out of the house for hours and threatened that no-one was to open it for me. Of course, with dear Master Syaoran's orders, they certainly did not.

And…then through those times… the harsh things he said to me. The rumors he spread around… the lies he cast upon me to Mr. Li. The times he purposely broke my precious belongings that connected me to my family…

That time he ripped my last picture of my family in pieces.

The time he ripped Kero's arm off…

That time he finally made me cry.

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(Syaoran POV)

Here I am, sitting in the popular section of the classroom. Yes. I'm in the popular section of my school.

These days, it is popular to say that you do not care. It's also popular to say that you hate yourself and it is also popular to treat other people like shit.

But it's not like I'm _trying_ to be this way.

I just _am_.

I can say that I don't give a shit about popularity. But I do. I do not want to be shunned. This is not my secret- because it is everyone's.

I can say that I treat everyone like shit- and that's because I can. I am not guilty.

I can say that I hate myself… and that is because I do. I do hate, yet do like to admit, my cowardice. Through this cowardice of mine, I have never had the courage to walk a step forward instead I've only waited and still waiting for people or someone to step to _me_.

But...

_She_ does not know- that every single day, every thought, every worry, every beat of my heart is dedicated to her. She also does not know- how many times I have wanted to tell her these pathetic feelings of mine.

I could not. I was too ashamed.

This pathetic and forbidden love of mine.

I built an invisible wall around me everyday. Again and again stronger and stronger…until I was sure that no one could break through it. I could not let my walls fall…

Until _she_ came into my life and carved away, each brick, one by one with her small feeble hands. Not giving up, even when the dark coarseness of my wall had scarred her very fingers into mounts of bruises. This small attention drove me into shame… and then to guilt… and then to an extreme obsession…Until every move of her hair became a memory to me.

I hated her. Father had always told me that he would never love my mother or I. His heart was far, while his body stayed near.

When _that woman_ came, I knew what he had meant. He had chosen an unworthy unfaithful moneyless gold-digging wife and her scruffy ugly child.

I cannot forget how much I hated those emerald eyes... the same eyes my shameful father fell for… the same eyes I've fallen for- and also the same eyes that killed my mother…

My mother… is pretty much the main reason I hated Sakura and the woman. But… my mother was someone I hated as well. Mother…had always been cold. Forced in an arranged marriage with Father, yet… still loving my father, she had given birth to me… and I could see the loneliness that always resided in the very pools of her eyes.

That cursed day of my life. I could not forget the blood- or the screaming… I could not forget the coldness of her hands…

That night, my mother had cut her cord. …

Mother had committed suicide;  
and all for the love of my traitorous father.

…leaving me in this betraying, frightening world.

Alone once again.

Father did not grieve, as the very next month. A Japanese whore of a mother came to join us… followed by her ugly brat cursed daughter.

* * *

"Homework. Page 81 Questions 1 and 2- Detention next Wednesday for any late homework, I will see you all on Friday."

Ahhhh Lesson finished. I really hate _economics_. Who wants to know about oil sales anyways? Jesus.. It's just _oil._

"Saku, I'll have to go for choir practice- but Chiharu and the others said they'll meet you at the tree. So—I'll see you later :D" I smiled as I waved to Tomoyo.

Yep. I belong in the Japanese crowd- we're not really in the popular crowd actually- maybe kind of the geek crowd. But that doesn't really bother me. I would hate to be with Syaoran's crowd. The popular group… they are so… scary. Most of the skater and punk crowds are much nicer to me than _them_.

Sigh. Lunchtime. The most less boring subject at school. Most of the lunchroom ladies know me well. Not that I actually talk to them… but because I always seem to cause some kind of disaster in the canteen…

And I guess most of everyone in the canteen knows me. Not as my name of course. But as "the pok-gai fall girl"

No, not because I have exceedingly beautiful flowing red hair that reminds everyone of autumn's falling red leaves. (Actually. I do have red hair. AUBURN hair. But that's not the point.)

No not really.

Pok-gai in Cantonese means a very vile swear word… meaning to fall over on your face- and die.

People seem to find it very amusing…

Its not my fault I--- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"HAHAHA THE POK-GAI GIRL'S ON THE LOOSE AGAIN" I heard as I slipped over a packet of crisps on the floor, with a plate of spaghetti bolognaise in my left hand… and as it fell all over the blond cheerleader girl next to me. Oh god… Oh my god. Now the boy in the front of me is falling over.! I MUST HAVE KICKED HIM AS WELL.

Oh my god his Coke is flying AHH I'TS ALL OVER MY SHIRT. Oh my God THE CAN HIT THAT GIRL.. HER HOTDOG JUST LANDED ON A TEACHER. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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….AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

…..AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

o…k… bye bye!!

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"Like, Oh my Gawwwwd that _girl_ is _soooooo_ BRAINLESS. She's like your _cousin_ right ShaoShao" I heard a raspy girl's voice rant to me.

I did not say anything. I don't really say much.

Besides I don't even know who the hell she is.

Except I'm kind of pissed off.

Sakura can do her thing and screw her self up, but she doesn't need to get her shirt wet with Coke.

I mean I mean- LOOK how many males are in this canteen… I bet they all saw her cleavage form…

Perverted Fuckers…  
(just indicating. Syaoran must be real perverted o0 cos that means he saw her cleavage too. Bad bad syaoran)

I glared at my best freak friend, who was laughing his ass off with the rest of the crowd.

Eriol Hiiragizawa, the freakiest Japanese freak alive.

He was someone who… well could literally do anything and be anything; and also happens to be the only person I can 1/1000 trust so far.

The rest of 999/1000- I would rather stay away from him.

I went back to my lunch. Suddenly, my spaghetti bolognaise looked disgustingly toxic. Oh great.

Sakura just got me off my appetite.

* * *

"_Ah… I can't believe I've done it again. WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME?_

_What if that teacher saw me…"_

**Today is a bad day.**

I was in the female toilet trying to clean my top from the spaghetti and coke it was covered with. I looked into the mirror. I'm a mess- I know. This always happened at least once a week.

When I had finally scrubbed the bolognaise sauce off my shirt as well as dried most of the coke—I stared at myself.

God.. This is so embarrassing. It looks like I ravaged the school kitchen and swam inside a saucepan of soup.

This is my last shirt too… Okay… no choice. I'll have to buy another one then. I just have to wash my hands…

And just as my luck could go, as I opened the tap…

SPLAASSSSSSSSSSH.

The water attacked me in its spite, a revengeful spirit that hung in its presence.

Great. Now my whole body was wet, and I stood helpless and still on the damp toilet floor.

This must be one of the **exceedingly bad days.**

Yes.. now. WHAT DO I DO?

I can't go out like this.. everyone can see through my shirt.

I had no choice. I had to run as fast as I can towards my locker on the 6th floor at the D-Block… and get my gym kit. But how do I get there without people seeing me… looking like someone who just **DROWNED** in the kitchen saucepan of soup. Wait. I don't even HAVE my Kit… Damn. I forgot. I left it in the car. Whatever, I'll go find Tomoyo and borrow from her. Um…

Okay..

One. Two. Three. GO.

As I stepped out rather nervously, I saw someone no other than Syaoran Li himself right next to the bathroom door.

I screamed.

"Shut up." I-normally-stand-in-front-of-girl-bathroom man said. That's what he's said to me the most in my life. "Shut up" this "Shut up" that.

He then did the strangest thing.

He looked at my shirt and shoved his gym kit into my arms. He very quickly walked away after that, without a word, without looking back.

I was confused for a few seconds as I stared at his gym bag. Then I realized and I yelled out "Thanks" which he ignored as he walked confidently away.

Um. Thanks anyways.

I got changed into his clothes- and feeling pretty small in his gym shirt- I timidly trotted back to find Chiharu and the rest.

* * *

Sakura was oblivious, to the fact that I could not turn back to her.

Oblivious that my face had turned tomato-red and I could not face her. Instead could only walk away. Or run away.

She was oblivious that I was also quite or incredibly happy. For once, I've done something to help her.

She was also oblivious to the fact that her being in my clothes was kind of refreshing.

God. I'm such an idiot.

* * *

Yeah… I know OO; not really passionate no? but Syaoran don't know passionate. He will though rofl HOHOHOHO 

Yes. There will be a lot of scenes of the past. Oh and I've already thought of the sweet scenes of sakura and syaoran :P

But yesh.

I am a bit sleepyness. Since I've posted 3 chaptters in one day.

Well. Good night everyone!

Angie out. -kicks komomo-chan off with her-


	4. Chapter 4: Another Step Back :updated:

Laaallallaalalla allaalalal deeeeeeeeeee dooooooo

Komomo : Shut up phinnie .-. stop looking at yaoi and do some work!! (angry)

Phinnie : noooooooooooooooo GIMME BACK MY YAOIIIIII T-T...

Komomo : o-o;... -deletes yaoi-

Phinnie : noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo grr rawr im going on strike. no yaoi... NO STORRYYY

Komomo : -raises fist-

Phinnie : o.o... j..just joking.

…

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Chapter 4 : Another Step Back

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…...

I am Syaoran Li.

Basically, I'm a 17 year old student in South Island School. The school where nothing happens. I get straight-A grades, I'm pretty much, extraordinary at all sports, I'm also one of the school's hottest food, I've got a lots of 'friends' and somewhat 'girls', oh and I'm also the heir to the Li Corps business- meaning I'm filthy rich and I walk around with at least 2 or 3 bodyguards behind me. So.

What's my flaw?

Well.

**_I fucking hate every single living thing in this world. _**

There is only one beautiful thing in this world and well I hate her too.

This lucky girl happens to be asleep on my shoulder at the moment. Asleep like an angel.

It's strange how this girl who happens to be scared to even sit a meter from me, always manages, to collapse and lean on my shoulder when she falls asleep.

"Get your head off me woman. You're cutting off my blood supply." I muttered into her ear.

She didn't move.

Not that I expected her to. So I used the tip of my finger and poked her head off me. No such luck. Her whole body collapsed once again, now with her head on my lap.

…

Well.

No complaint here.

Sakura is one of those people who never really try to look her best. To me, I would say she always looks best. The small curl in the end of her auburn hair always shines lighter than the rest of her hair… so natural and so enticing. It's quite fun to pull a strand of her hair and then watch it curl back again- like a spring.  
…

Someone slap me, I'm growing dumber everyday.

Her face expression remained to look so peaceful… so angelic and innocent. So angelic that at times I wanted to taint her pureness and destroy it.. (Komomo says : S&M?!?!??!?!!?! Phinnie : yay!!! Komomo: ... (smack))

It's wrong but, I really wanted to kiss her then.

I swallowed slowly.

_Damn_. _Must Control self. Must control self._

Someone slap me again. I'm growing more demented every day.

I saw that her hands were lightly clutching something.

Oh. It's the Kero thing. The small stupid looking doll…thing she carries around everywhere. I know that, that doll is really precious to her- Something her dad gave her or something.

That doll…

Hmmm…

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_It has been nearly…2 years since Sakura had come to Hong Kong. She was eleven now, going twelve. Her mother had passed away from a sudden disease only a few months ago. Yet she had bravely gotten up and refused to break down._

_People had started calling her "the cursed one", as her father and brother had gone to heaven whilst she was in Japan, and now as she arrived to Hong Kong, her mother had fell sick, and after a short 1 year and a half, followed suit; passing away. _

_ Her step-father loathed her, also believing that she was the sole-reason for her mother's death. She was a cursed child afterall, and she was not even his own child. However, she had those bright green eyes, so similar to her mother; he was weak in its presence. Thus, he avoided her, ignoring her presence, to an extent of often forgetting her existance. _

_Not that she had a problem. He was bound to a marriage contract with her mother; and thus even through his loath, he had taken her in. She was thankful.  
_

_She did not excel in English, nevertheless, she could at least now understand it.  
Kero, was a doll that she carried around with her all the time- since it was made from her father 5 years ago, it had become one of her most precious possessions… as well as one of her only ones too._

_Sakura had been cleaning the backyard, clutching Kero in her little left hand whilst dusting the leaves off the main walkway. There was a lot of maids and servants living in the Li household, and she was one of them. _

_After her mother's death, everyone agreed that she had no more meaning than the other servants, and thus for her living and food, she had worked in the Li Household. _

_As Kero, as her only friend and hope she had peacefully accepted her place in life. After all it was true that she had never really been the daughter of Mr. Li. _

_Mr. Li pretty much did not really care of her existence, he did not know her name, and did not try to.. She had never seen him after the funeral ceremony, it did not affect her. He had given her shelter as well as food; she had nothing left in this world. _

"_Hey servant-girl what's in your hand?" said the first mocking voice. _

"_Yeah servant girl what's clutched on your little servant hands huh? Are you cursing your doll too?" the second said. The little girl faced them, with a big smile._

"_s that how you killed your whole family? That's dangerous isn't it? __Hand it over cursed-servant-girl" said the first. "Yeah- give it to us now" followed the second._

_Still holding a huge smile, Sakura answered. "Sorry, I can't give you this. My father made it for me, its very precious to me you see" _

"_Who says I can't? I'm taking it anyways HAHA" the first barked as he snatched the doll from the girl's passive hands. "Yeah—Try taking it back cursed dweeb Huh Huh" the second followed._

"_Aiya—Really I can't give it you hehe" Sakura, still giggling, kicked the first boy in the face and retrieved back her Kero doll back to her hands. _

"_D-did that ignorant little orphan just kick me? How dare she?" _

"_We are high-class rich people. Get on your knees slave."_

"_Let's tell the other servants to get rid of her" _

"_You are so dead little girl, just like your family."_

_Through all the talking, Sakura had never stopped smiling the same smile. _

"_Bet you guy's can't do that" she answered in her cheerful sing-song voice.  
"Who says we can't? Watch us Huh Huh" the second replied._

_Sakura, then stated jokingly, with her ever-present smile "Because you both have a crush on me that's why." _

_Both the boys turned bright red. _

_"A-a-as if!!!"  
_

_Speechless, the first boy slapped her hand- causing Kero to fall to the floor… and right in front of The Syaoran Li's foot._

_Syaoran Li was standing just a few meters away from them, his hands in his pockets of his sophisticated suit and tie, which he wore every single day. _

_His presence screamed authority. _

_The two boys looked up fearfully to the cold icy stare that was directed at them.  
"Uh-uh it-it's S-Syaoran. U-um Uh G-Good afternoon… L-lets go" _

_The scrawny boys ran away, quite hastily actually, the obvious fear of Syaoran's power, present on their faces. _

"_Hi Syaoran! Could you pick Kero up for me?" Sakura said in the same sweet voice and big smile._

_Syaoran did not say anything, he merely stared at her, a still cold glare daggering from his eyes. _

_Sakura, now with a given up still-present smile on her face, bent down to reach for her doll… that was when Syaoran got his feet on top of it before she could get it. _

"_Go on. Cry." That was all he said as he stepped onto the doll deeper and deeper into the ground. Sakura was frozen, just watching her doll, with a stunned expression in her face. She looked up at Syaoran as if begging him to lift his foot._

"_I said. Cry. Your useless mother just fricken **died**. And you're smiling. YOU cursed her, and you know it. If only you weren't alive, your family would still be alive. What are you… mentally retarded? Some brainless robot? Or maybe your an evil witch... As vile as your own vile mother." _

_Sakura, still frozen could just stare at him. By then, Syaoran had kicked the doll and caught it with his hands… and with his other hand he ripped the doll's left arm… and then the right arm. _

_Sakura's eyes were now in shock as she stared at the cotton flowing out of the ripped limbs._

"_Stop faking that smile. Liar. Dumbass. Witch." With that, Syaoran turned away to walk off._

_There was a moment silence, as Sakura stared blankly at her broken precious treasure. _

"_Are you happy now?" Syaoran stopped and looked back at her with the same cold expression._

_Sakura slowly got up, her face hidden under her hair._

"_Are you happy now? Now that you've ruined the only item left of my family… The only precious thing I've got left in this world?" _

_Syaoran's eyes had now widened as he saw Sakura's tears drop._

"_Syaoran…You're wrong. You're the robot. Even though you'__re just a kid, you've never even smiled or laughed ever… At least…At least I haven't given up at living life. That's the best and only thing I can do for my family in heaven."  
_

_Syaoran stared speechless, Sakura's words froze him, colder than any ice, so cold that it burnt- her tears opened something inside himthat was once thought as non-existent _

Sakura lifted her head, her eyes full of pity, tears sorrowing down her face, as if scorching her skin with heavy volume.

_ Was she crying for me?_

Syaoran turned his heel and ran off, his mind was diseasing with anger, confusion and hatred... but his heart was acting strangely... beating so fast with something he could not understand.

"_**At least… I haven't given up at living my life…**__**"**_

…………

…………………

…………………………

……………………

……………

Syaoran was deep in thought when I woke up. He did not notice that I was awake. Nor did I notice my head was on his lap either. I was too busy watching him.

His eyes had a different shade to it. A shade I didn't often see. Clutched on his hand, was my Kero doll.

I panicked.

When did he get the doll off me? What will he do with it?

But I could not move, somehow my eyes were frozen on his fingers. His fingers were tracing over the rough stitching on Kero's limbs… I had stitched that after he had ripped the limbs about…well ages ago… 5 or 6 years ago it could be.

When Syaoran finally realized I was awake, that was when _I_ realized I was on his _lap_. He dropped the doll in surprise and I jumped up from surprise… bashing my pathetic head on the car ceiling. "AHHHH I'M SORRY…Ah…Oww…"

His eyes had gone back to its normal shade and were now looking out of the window. I watched his reflection on the window in curiosity.

I don't know what came over me, but I asked. "S-Syaoran, do you still remember that time… that time when my doll was ripped." I did not say that he had ripped it. I didn't want to sound accusing.

As if he was dying to say it, Syaoran answered immediately.

"Of course I remember. How can I forget…? How can I forget when it was the first time I ever saw you cry." His voice was dripping with… somewhat anguish. Even his eyes seemed quite…different.

I did not fully understand but…

I smiled at him. Somehow it felt that something was different... Something was warmer.

Syaoran said nothing after that.

And the rest of the journey was spent in a comfortable silence.

…………….

……………………

…………………………..

……………………………………

* * *

Hm. This one is pretty much on a sweet memory. Oh and someone wanted to make sure Kero was in the story. Ha. Besides. Kero is also my favorite character. :') 

Komomo : of course Kero has to be important! He was the first memory that triggered Syaoran's heart hehehe how romaanttticc (smile)

Phinnie : ... (yawn) I want a Kero doll too... and those anime figures... ooo specially the d.grayman and fate stay night (drool)

Komomo: ... Please beat this otaku up. She's drooling over guy AND girl figures.

Phinnie : excuse me, otakus are free people!!! in anime it doesnt matter whether its a girl or guy.. muhahaha...

Komomo : -jumps off cliff-

Phinnie : nuuuu don't leave me alone in this cruel cruel world -watches anime-


	5. Ch5: Chocolate Pancakes or Jam on Toast?

**Firstly, the reason Syaoran is quite nice and less cold now is because Sakura opened him up. And the reason Sakura and Syaoran doesn't seem to have that kind of maid-master relationship is because they are very used to each other. After 7 or more years and all. **

Incase people might get confused. And since im in a awfully happy mood. Except its really hot today. Blah im burnninggggg.

**-A Lonely Reminiscent-.** Nadeshiko's side of the story will be coming up ; )!

**Yuehswind** – Wah! I'm really sorry if some of the swear words in this was a bit drastic. I had to build up Syaoran's aggressive character- thus making his language a bit harsher. Haha Bad Syaoran XD

**Cassie** – Sorry Cassie im not really sure what im suppose to send to your email.. ( im a noob I know TT—haha thank you the intro took the least time though haha XD

**Musette Fujiwara** – Your very right. Yes Syaoran did feel a bit guilty. :D  
**White-LK** – haha couldn't resist. HELLO! XDXD

Who disclaimed the disclaiming disclaimer of disclaimers? Um. Disclaimer? YES! (god… im lame ..)

Muhaha I feel like a 3rd person today. –goes over to corner with cone hat- - everyone points. LONER-

Disclaimer – I don't own CCS ladeedah. But I DO own Syaoran… NOOO DON'T TAKE HIM AWAY.! AT LEAST GIVE ME SYAORAN NOOOOOOOOOOOO :(

Okayokay I'll start.

* * *

Chapter 5

Chocolate Pancakes? Or Jam on Toast?

* * *

**_Tomorrow Oni-san and Otou-san and me are going to the Tomoeda Temple to put up wishes and visit our ancestors… Tomorrow… Tomorrow…_**

_November 25th 1999._

_Right now I'm at my bedroom window watching the raindrops fall one by one. _

_Drip_

_. Drop._

_Drip._

_Drop. _

_One. Two. Three. Four. Five._

_Drip_

_. Drop._

_Drip_

_. Drop._

_The rain is so funny._

_I love the rain._

_Oni-san said that rain was water that dripped from a GIGANTIC wet towel being squeezed in the sky. I- I bet he was lying! I- I bet…But… What if it was real? But I can't see any towel…_

_  
I'm alone at home at the moment. Because of the rain we decided not to go to the temple today… But that's okay! _

_We can always go tomorrow_.

_This morning, Otou-san said that Oni-san had to go to school because of an urgent call and that Daddy would drive him there. I wanted to go too…but Otou-san said I should stay home because the weather was cold. _

_I'm already 9 years old._

_I can take care of myself. _

_It's not fair… why do I have to stay home…_

_Oh. The phone's ringing!_

_As soon as I picked up the phone and asked who it was… "HELLO? HELLO? GIVE THE PHONE TO ANY ADULT IN YOUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW! WHERE IS YOUR MOTHER? GIVE THE PHONE TO YOUR MOTHER!" I did not recognize the voice but it held such a scary tone._

"_Um… I'm sorry… my mom isn't here." And right after I replied the unknown voice immediately said "DO YOU KNOW YOUR MOTHER'S MOBILE PHONE NUMBER AT LEAST?"_

"_I don't know…" I did not know what to say. Daddy had said I should not talk to strangers… but this voice seemed so urgent._

"_Okay… God. Look kid, CALL ANY ADULT OVER THAT YOU KNOW TO TAKE THIS PHONE. DO THIS NOW."_

_I didn't know what to do. So I ran out and brought Kaho-sensei, who lived right across the street and was my school teacher. _

_When Kaho-sensei got the phone, her face turned from her normal gentle expression to a shocked panic._

_She grabbed my hand and in one second I was in her car. _

_I was so confused. _

_I didn't know what was happening. Kaho-sensei kept on repeating the words "Please… Please… Please…"_

_I still didn't understand._

_How could I?_

_I found myself in front of a hospital, Kaho-sensei held on to my hand tightly and we ran into the building. Kaho-sensei talked to a doctor who said something in t he lines of "I'm Sorry…" and "It's too late" _

_Then as if her legs had disappeared, she collapsed into the seat next to her. _

_Me, still holding her hand, just watched. Kaho-sensei hugged me then._

_What was happening…? _

_I don't know what came over me, but somehow I figured it was something to do with Otou-san and Oni-san…_

_Where were they…_

_I-I have to go back home. D-daddy said I wasn't to go out…O-otou-san and and O-oni-san is waiting for me at home… I have to go back… I have to go back…_

_I was screaming these words…I didn't evenknow I was. I didn't notice I was crying too._

_No... No... No... No **I have to go home.**_

_No  
NO  
NO._

_No…._

_No….._

**_"We can always go tomorrow_…"**

**

* * *

**

"SAKURA. SAKURA! SAKURA! GET UP NOW. MASTER SYAORAN WANTS HIS BREAKFAST. WE ARE GOING NOW. YOU BETTER WAKE UP IN TIME! Lazy girls these days…."

"Argh…" Sakura groaned as she got up and grabbed the nearest clean set of clothes she could find.

It was a Sunday, the day where she was most free!

...to do the house chores.

Also the day the maids and servants had a day out- (or a day to go to church)

Meaning, instead of the divided repeated chores she normally did on a normal day, she was to do everything alone.

It was the day she cooked the breakfast, the lunch and the dinner, with her limited knowledge of cooking.

The day she cleaned the windows, cleaned the floors, cleaned the kitchen, dusted the bedrooms, cleaned up the backyard, the front-yard and the front pavement… oh and the rest of the house.

The day she watered the plants, the trees, the flowers and the rest of the greens. Also the day she washed the dog, washed the dishes, and washed the cars.

The day she… well was also Syaoran's personal maid… well pretty much.

**

* * *

**

(Sakura point of view)

With that, I went down to the big pool in the yard. Knowing Syaoran, he would probably be swimming vigorously on a Sunday morning.

Like he always did.

He always reminded of a _penguin_.

Fast at swimming.

Slow at walking with some kind of slouchy waddle.

Oh and his skin was an as cold and rubbery as one too.

Yep.

He was definitely a reincarnation…

…of a wittle penguin.

A very fit penguin I'd say.

Judging from the giggling about-13-years-old girls peeking and waving through the gates…he must be a very _popular_ male penguin.

Too bad Syaoran happens to be a different species to them, he'll never wave back.

Oh Wow. Syaoran waved back.

I guess… he is starting to get some emotion in him- or maybe he's turning into a major player…

Err.

Syaoran always had a way with water. Often, whenever feeling down or deprived, he has a habit of relating with a source of water. Either by swimming, taking a shower, having a drink, or sometimes, standing in the rain.

Rain… had always been the weather I feared. After the car accident that killed my father and brother, I had… always been scared of rain.

Therefore, I always had stayed inside when it rained, as well as made sure most people around me was inside… in case the rain might take away another close person of mine.

Sometimes, I could not bring myself out of the building, even with an umbrella. I cannot stand rain. The rain was the enemy… the nemesis… the murderer. The murderer of oni-san and otou-san.

"_**The rain is so funny.**_

_**I love the rain." **_

Oh right. I've dreamt that dream last night again.

Anyways, Syaoran had again jumped into the pool, gliding into the water in his tanned shoulders and six-pack. His messy hair spiked up and then flattening from the splashing water, making the girls in the back, squeal, every time his head came out for air.

I may not want to admit it, but my step-brother sure is pretty.

"Syaoran. Syaoran! W-what would you like for breakfast today? Would you like the Chocolate Pancakes that I've got a batch of or the normal jam on toast?"

Syaoran swam towards me, and since I was standing in the edge of the pool, My whole skirt was soaked with a huge amount of water his arm has splashed. I could hear the silly little girls in the back giggling and sneering at me. God.

"S-Syaoran… W..what would you like for breakfast" I said in a strained voice- restraining myself from shivering from the sudden coolness of my legs. Syaoran must have noticed my straining tactics, since he stared hard at my drenched skirt for a few seconds and then practically **drowned** me from head to toe with more water.

Despite his emotionlessness, I could still tell right away of Syaoran's current mood and thoughts, just by looking at him. Maybe its animal instinct or something. Obviously he seemed to be in a very proud happy mood in drenching me. Although he hasn't shown anything in emotion. I just _know_.

By this time, I've had enough and decided to get him jam on toast as punishment. I was basically sopping wet and so I slowly slopped back into the house, leaving a trail of water. Syaoran followed, with his towel, also creating a trail of water in the garden steps.

"Sakura. I said Chocolate Pancakes. CHOCOLATE PANCAKES. I hate jam on toast. CHOCOLATE PANCAKES!" He repeated as he heavily caught up to my footsteps, dripping with water.

Sigh. I'll have to clean the water later. He had followed me all the way to my bedroom… Syaoran never changes.

"Syaoran? You've nearly _drowned_ me on the shore. I need to get CHANGED NOW. Meaning you shouldn't be in my room and _Simply_, that **you** should wait **outside** in the **garden**, where **I'll** get you **your** breakfirst **SIR**."

And I closed the door.

"NO. I'm specially eating in the kitchen with you slave" he yelled through the door surface.

Syaoran had a power to hold authority in his eyes. His eyes could freeze anyone, and pretty much decrease their size emotionally. But, since there was a door between us and I couldn't see his hypnotic eyes.  
I yelled back. "Shut Up Syaoran. AT LEAST I HAVE MORE BRAINS THAN MONEY"  
"WHAT? You wanna die woman? Get out of there NOW!" he yelled, now banging the door with his fist.

I couldn't stop laughing and I couldn't come out either.

AHhhh The hypnotic scary eyeballs will eyebeam me to my deathhhh.

After 10 minutes when it had returned quiet. I thought he had walked away, and so I opened the door very quickly, to get to the kitchen as fast as I could. .

Not knowing Syaoran was still there, and was leaning on the other side of the door.

Causing his heavy body to instantly fall on mine, as soon as I opened the door knob.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M DYINGGGGGGG.

**

* * *

**

Lol :P I know what im going to write next chapter.

Next chapter is going to be really cute. And sweet

And its called "After the Rain"


	6. Chapter 6: After the Rain :updated:

God I should be revising for my exams and im here writing fanfiction. Haha.

Thank you Thank you for the reviewers. :) it gives me motivation R&R please

I'm feeling really sick at the moment wahhhh TT

Hope – Thank you your post really motivated me :) The sweetness level will stay neutral XD Its true it IS really hard for me to write in 1st person :( it is. But I try :) its like… when im writing instead of writing thoughts about Syaoran and Sakura. I try to **be** them instead, think what they think, do what they do and well become the actual character. It often helps :D Writing from the character's point of view, but at the same time in the same pace as the story is quite difficult, but a challenge is a challenge :D XD

Well. This is probably one of my favourite parts of the fic. :P

Disclaimer – I don't own ccs- stuff clamp grr ; took syaosyao away from me ;o;

(-L-;;) - that happens to be a face.

oh and to make things clear  
Syaoran - 17  
Sakura - 17

Ha. ; Yes they are both 17. and if u read it verycarefully, you can find how old they are in each flashback.  
in the present, they are both 17.

Aiite...

* * *

Chapter 6: After the Rain**

* * *

**

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M DYINGGG"

I literally dropped dead, paralyzed on the ground; until I felt something poking my cheek.

I fluttered my eyes a bit to focus back into the sane world.  
All I could see was a big blur of amber and hazel.

Oh, it was just Syaoran. He was poking his finger into my left cheek with a face of half irony and half panic.

"…SAKURA! GET UP! You're not DEAD you klutz...Uh Hello?. Sakura? Uh you're not dead are you? HUH? HAVE YOU DIED?" I heard Syaoran shout in a puzzled voice, while now stretching both my cheeks sideways and then shaking my shoulders frantically.

I then opened my eyes and I burst out laughing. I couldn't stop _laughing_.

I don't know why, but it was just too hilarious.

"Syaoran, how can I get up, you're on top of me. **Get Your Lazy Butt Up**!. You're cutting off my air supply! And if you do I WILL die- and _you_ won't have any _breakfast_- so get up, you weigh like a boar!" I yelled back at him in the middle of my giggles.

I am _awfully_ childish, I admit, but what I can I say?

Syaoran's expression when he thought I _died_ from his heavy butt was just too funny.

"UH. HEY. Stop laughing. I don't wanna be _sued_ for killing my maid…by externally squashing her to her death you know. Although. I'm sure. You wouldn't mind dying this way huh?" he replied.

It really is funny, how he can say those stuff with a completly cold straight emotionless face. It really is amazing.

Still laughing, I also got up and headed for the kitchen.

Wait, ;o; i'm not a maaaaaid!!!

**

* * *

**

Syaoran must have been really hungry, as he digged in to the ice-cream so enthusiastically...

Syaoran to Ice-cream : Fat Kid to Cake.

Sometimes I think he's as childish as I am. He's got some big addiction to chocolate. Especially that Mint and Chocolate Icecream thats sold across the road.

Which I secretly suspect, it's because of the _color_. I'm serious, Green is his favourite color. Syaoran can be so _strange_ly childish sometimes.

It's sort of cute.

So here I am, making Chocolate Pancakes for Syaoran Li. Yes. The cold scary serious Syaoran Li goes crazy over Chocolate Pancakes and follows me dripping wet, all the way to my bedroom to make that clear.

Hah.

"OWWWWWWWW" I screamed as I cut my finger while trying to cut the tough chocolate.

Amazingly, Syaoran appeared in less than a second next to me, grabbing my arm and dragging me to the first aid box that lied in the other room.

"You're so stupid…" he muttered at me while my lower lip trembled from the pain. It felt as if the knife had gone through half way my finger, and I could feel the blood drip.

Syaoran got out the pile of bandages, as he wrapped a piece of tissue around my wound like a tourniquet. I noticed how some of my blood had gotten onto his hand, but he did not really care. I felt so useless and stupid, I seriously can't do anything right.

He held the tissue around my finger with his left hand as he tried to find the bandages with his right…

His hands…

………….

…………………

……………………………

………………….

…………..

….

_It was raining again._

_I couldn't sleep when it rained. I've never been able to sleep when it rained ever since that incident 4 years ago._

_It was my 13th birthday last week, no one knew, but Tomoyo had set up a surprise party for me with Rika, Chiharu, Naoko and the others. _

_It's been 3 years since I've come to Hong Kong… and I've met a lot of nice people. _

_Drip._

_Drop._

_Drip._

_Drop_

'_Oni-san… I can see the towel now. You were right. Can you see it from up there too?' I thought as I looked up at the dark cloud that was painted over the night sky. I smiled at the sky. _

_I miss you too Oni-san._

_My eyes dropped from the sky and into the backyard that was hardly visible from my window. I felt sorry for the birds that were outside in the rain. The whole bird family must be getting wet…_

_Suddenly, I saw something move. Something **big** move. No wait… It was **someone.** _

_I looked closely and more closely… it was… it was Syaoran!_

_  
What was Syaoran doing in the rain? He didn't even have an umbrella, and his clothes were all wet and they didn't even look very warm! What is he doing? He will get a cold! _

_I've always had a complex with people getting wet in the rain, it always bothered me._

_But… I couldn't go out to get him… I couldn't stand the rain… and even worse, it was night. Dead night. It could be dangerous… but… Syaoran. _

_Syaoran had always been much of my enemy… but I could not help but worry about him. After all he was still my step-brother. _

_Incase he was going to go back in; I waited for a few minutes and just watched him… What was he doing…?_

_About 10 minutes had passed, and Syaoran had not moved a muscle from where he was standing. I was scared, but I had to get him out of the rain. He could **die** if he spent the whole night outside!_

_And then… I'll lose another person around me because of the rain, and because I didn't do anything about it. It'll be my fault again._

_So I grabbed an umbrella, completely forgetting that I was still in my light pajamas, and headed out into the backyard._

"_Syaoran! Syaoran!" I called out in a sort of loud whisper._

_He did not answer. The rain was so loud… I could not hear myself either._

_I was scared. _

_The rain… _

_Eventually, I found him. He was standing next to the rosebushes in the corner of the backyard. I walked towards him, he still did not notice me. When I got in front of him, he immediately noticed me and was shocked._

_I also noticed something too._

_He was crying._

_Syaoran had been outside, and he was crying. in the rain.  
_

_I was shocked too. Even though the rain continuously hit his cheeks, I could definitely see the redness of his eyes and the small bubbles of tears that flowed down from them. _

"_S-Syaoran.. What's Wrong…?" I said in a worried whisper._

"_Go away. Leave me alone. It's none of your business." HIs voice raspy and croaked...His face was now facing away from me, and his eyes covered by his wet hair._

"_Syaoran! You'll get a cold, let's go back okay?" I then shouted over the blaring screams of the rain. _

_Syaoran did not answer. _

_So I walked over to him and tried to block him from the rain at least, with the blue umbrella that I was holding. _

_Syaoran shoved me away, and my umbrella dropped to the ground. _

_Rain fell on me; the familiar drop of the rain, my biggest fear was falling on me. Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop. One. Two. Three. Four. Five._

_Then, I understood. The reason Syaoran was standing in the rain._

_He was looking for a shelter to cry. Cry without anyone noticing. Cry without it being seen, Cry without it being heard, Cry without anyone knowing. _

_He was looking for a place to cry alone.  
_

_Syaoran had also wanted to cry… yet couldn't find a place where he could. Now I understood…he was human too. Like every human, he had feelings too, he felt hurt too and that sometimes he wanted to cry too._

_I always wondered how he had kept in emotion... as if he never had them, as if they never existed. His emotions were locked up in a dark deep dungeon in his heart, and every so often when it rained... he must have had them cleansed away. _

_Why did he have to cry alone? Had this cruel world done so much to him... that he refused to show weakness... thus forced to cry alone?_

_// As you go through life, many believe that being strong, meant that you did not cry. Many believed that crying meant a sense of weakness… a sign of giving up. _

_Yet, Sometimes, **not-crying** meant that you did not **feel**. Crying was a **cure**. A cure, a chance to let go and free your emotions. __Giving up, meant that you were still holding anguish inside yourself, and that you were stuck in it. Hence, freeing these emotions, you could have space for new ones.. //_

_I stood there and watched him, and I could feel my tears fall as well. _

_So this is why, he loved the rain._

_It gave him a nocturne shelter. _

_Syaoran noticed that I still did not walk away, and that I was still under the rain watching him… "Go away. I SAID. Go. AWAY. Aren't you scared of rain or something. Well your under it. So F-ck off" He shouted at me, in a mix of shame, embarrassment and anger._

_But I couldn't go._

_Forgetting the umbrella, I walked towards him, and he cautiously took a step away. _

"_Syaoran. If I can't block you from the rain, I'll just stand here with you. Lets be under the rain together."  
_

_Syaoran looked at me for a few seconds, I couldn't see his face._

_And then he started coughing uncontrollably, as if he had resisted the coughs for years. _

_I then reached for his hand. _

_It was so cold._

**"S-sakura.. I wasn't crying... the rain hit my eye..."**

_His hands were icy cold, colder than the rain, colder than ice. _

_Just like his heart was._

_But he had still let me help him._

_**"I know.. of course you weren't."**_

……………………………………

………………………

……………

…………………………………

**

* * *

**

"Ah!" I cringed, Syaoran had pressed a bit too hard onto my bleeding finger. That awoke my daydreams… and made me realize something.

I called him.

"Syaoran."

"Sorry." He answered.

"Syaoran" I asked again.

"I said. I was sorry." He answered again.

"No. Not that… Syaoran. Y-your hands… they're so… **warm**."

Syaoran did not say anything for a few seconds, until he awkwardly said "Oh"

...  
...

I don't know why… but my finger didn't hurt anymore.

Even when the pain had deceased, tears fell uncontrollably on my lap.

_Syaoran thank you for letting me help you. I finally remember how I overcame my fears. _

**...

* * *

... **

xP Ah HA!

LAddeeeDOODAAA

I've finished. And now back to my studies doo deee dooo da. I may not post soon since im in my exams :)


	7. Chapter 7: Angels and Doors :updated:

**THE CHAPTER STARTS WITH SYAORAN'S POINT OF VIEW**

I do not want to ruin the start by starting with the words "Syaoran's Point Of View" so theres we go.

Hello :) How is everyone? I didn't update for about a week. Which is a baddie thing to do :P

Um. I decided to add a E and T …

Thank you to all the ones I couldn't reply because of no link. :) **Cassie and hope**. And everyone else who read and reviewed.

**syaoran101** - :) Hello! First of all Thank you veryy much for the nice comments you gave me hehe nearly for evry chapter tooHahaha ooo and heres the reply!

Sakura and Syaoran are **not** half-siblings. They are not blood related at all. Hehe which makes it legal :D though quite not approvable. Ehhh. Syaoran's late mother would be Yelen and his father be Mr Li.  
Sakura's late mother and father be Nadeshiko (I know. Shame :X) and Fujitaka- and with Sakura's late brother Touya.

So none of the family trees are changed hehe

Oh and your right. It DID take him 6 or 7 years to realize that he's in love.

**Yuehswind** – yes sir :D sorry dearie brain block ;)

**Lottie** – AHHAHA u actually commented lottie? XD hahah! I know I know Stanley isn't like that BUT DON'T TELL ANYONE THAT XD : ( :P ahhhh I'll see uuu at schoooool :D xxx love u! eww I got my jelly all over my table 

Disclaimer – I don't own ccs but I do have jelly on my table ;(

So people. When theres a huge paragraph that looks like this  
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Or somthin like that with lots of full stops. It means the first person is thinking back to the past. Meaning they are flashbacks of the PASS. And it is them thinking IN THE PAST. :):) the words will be in italic so people can recognize which is the PAST. :)

* * *

Chapter 6

Angels and Doors

* * *

The world is a box. 

A box is a room.

A room has a floor.

A ceiling.

Walls…

A door.

A Window.

Light… Travels in straight lines, but that didn't matter, because there wasn't any light at all.

It was dark.

I cannot see anything. I could not see anything. I will not see anything.

There was a time.

When there was a window. Light shined through it… and my world was to be filled with light…

However… I had a curtain.

I was too shy to let that light surround me.

Yet, I had tried to open those curtains often… until one day.

The curtains ripped.

The window cracked

The light left

And it all disappeared altogether.

I was left in the dark.

The world was dark again, with no source of light. I was scared and cold.

I looked for light… but I couldn't find any. I looked for a door to escape. I couldn't find any…

I didn't know… that doors were all around me, and that they were just locked.

And so I was lost in the dark, lost and vulnerable, as I locked everyone out.

Until one day… a girl found a key.

A key to open my door.

And my world was opened.

She opened the door. Light shone so bright it hurt my eyes.

So I tried to lock her out, push her away…

I tried to block the light away, but she had held out a hand to me.

And so I ran towards her hand… towards the light… but the faster I ran, the farther she got…

Until I fell…until I gave up and decided to stay back in the dark.

…

That is when the girl opened the door wide, stepped into my world and instead of holding out and hand by the door… She walked into my world and caught me instead.

Light surrounded me, and it didn't burn my eyes anymore.

And I never knew… the person who had locked the door… was myself.

She was my light.

Sakura Kinomoto was my light.

And my world was not alone anymore.

* * *

And I woke. 

It was a Sunday morning. The birds were singing a crappy song, the sun was blazing and the annoying kids were taking their noisy dogs for a walk.

Normally, I would wake up early and have an early swim… but a strange dream had conquered my sleep. Sakura had appeared on it.

Damn it. I actually _dream_ about her.

I heard a knock on the door. "Syaoran! I was going to leave you to sleep but there's been a phone call for you for the fifth time."

It was Sakura.

I don't know but I felt myself incredibly red. I'm so stupid… Her voice reminded me back to the dream.

Sakura opened the door, and walked in. Somehow that scene looked very familiar.

"Syaoran, Here's your phone and----d here's your breakfast." Sakura walked in with a huge smile on her face, holding a small breakfast-in-bed table…with breakfast, along with a pile of towels balancing on her head and even after all that, having a phone between her ear and shoulder.

I stared at her monotonously. It was amazing. How she could balance all that, but could never walk out of the canteen without getting ketchup on her shirt.

"Okay! _Master_ Syaoran had just woken up from his _beauty sleep_, he, apparently still in his pajamas, is absolutely _thrilled_ to talk to you" Sakura hummed into the phone as she placed the breakfast on my bed and the towels on the couch.

"What'dya want Nick. _Dude_ you woke me up from my _beauty sleep_." I muttered into the phone groggily. I could hear Sakura giggling.

I couldn't help it, every time she laughs its nearly impossible not to smile with her.

"HAHA. _Dude._ Do you even _know_ what time it is? Well, its 12:30 and its time for lunch damn right. Hey, Have I ever told you that Sakura's voice is dead cute on the phone?" I heard Nick Crawford ram on the phone.

"No. Shut up. What'dya want?"

"That's not very nice Syaoran!" I heard Sakura say from the other side of the room.

"You shut up too." I answered back at her.

Sakura just smiled back at me.

…

Blah.

"Yeah. Syaoran stop being a _meanie_. HAHA Anyways DUDE. ERIOL HI-..Um. Hi-Um. WHATEVER I can't pronounce his last name. ANYWAYS Guess what I heard? Eriol's in _lurrrrvee_! AND WITH A GIRL. We were both wrong. Eriol isn't _gay_ after all! And all this time, we thought the reason for his anti-woman-ism was because he was GAY! But NOOOO."

I did not say anything through all this.

"Spread the news dude. Hey by the way, I _have_ told you that Sakura's voice is damn hot haven't I?"

"Shut up."

I was pissed off.

I know.

My jealousy rate is probably higher than anyone else, but it's not like anyone should even like someone like Sakura anyways.

I mean no one would like an ugly orphan girl with not much of a sexual charm. Right?

No one would like Sakura the way I do except… well, me.

"Dude I need to get myself a girlfriend. Is Sakura free huh? Huh? Huh? How come I'm still a virgin? Dude is something WRONG WITH ME?"

At this point, I was staring at Sakura.

She had just opened the windows and the wind blew in.

I watched her in my normal expressionless face. Her hair was flying and her eyes were surprised. She was holding the pile of towels again.

The sudden burst of wind must have alarmed her, since she had tripped from the edge of the carpet and the folded towels all opened up once again and had smothered her.

She got up laughing, her hair flying, her emerald eyes filled with mirth and towels all over her…

Truthfully, she wasn't ugly. She was probably the most beautiful thing in the world… and truthfully, she had this ability to laugh and smile in any situation… that was probably the biggest charm that had drawn me to her… and truthfully… she wasn't really an orphan because… she had always considered _me_ her family…

I must have been watching her for a really long time since I could hear Nick Crawford shouting onto the phone

"SYAORAN. THAT WAS A NO RIGHT? NOTHING'S WRONG WITH ME RIGHT? DUDE ANSWER ME!"

Blah.

I hung up on him.

Sakura had made me pancakes again…and beside the plate was a glass of chocolate milk. She is probably the only person in the world to know that I liked chocolate milk.

Shameful but true.

It really was a nice day today.

* * *

(Eriol's story) 

I did not even know her.

I never even knew her name. I never knew she even existed.

Nor did I exist in her life.

We were two different people… oblivious to what each other meant… We lived in literally two different _worlds_… yet we stood on the same floor not knowing.

Such a stupid cliché tale, but I was in it. Such a stupid character… but I was being it.

Such a stupid feeling, but I was feeling it.

Everyone probably knows the story of Cinderella. One of the most famous fairytale stories of all time, a tale that had been re-written, re-performed and re-made over centuries.

It is a story that was made all over the world… a story that had many versions, many different names and cultures…yet, the same plot. The best-known version was probably the one written by the French author, Charles Perrault in 1697… the version that Disney had animated and become one of the most famous Disney movies over time.

But it wasn't the first.

There were millions of versions of "Cinderella" written before Charles Perrault's fairytale.

The earliest version of the story originated in China around 860 A.D. It appeared in "The Miscellaneous Record of You Yang" by Tuan Ch'eng-Shih, a book which dates all the way from the Tang Dynasty.

Anyways.

Again, my logic has taken over… and covered what I really wanted to say.

I should have recognized her right away, but I did not. My logic took over once again and I have once again mixed my head with my heart. (Damn I must stop rhyming.)

It's been more than… 3 years It was… ages ago. I was…about only the start of my teens, of about 13 or 14 of age.

That warm night of Spring… was the night I met her. She was not the girl of my dreams… my ideal type of woman… or the perfect girl that I was looking for.

She wasn't perfect…

She wasn't what I expected.

**_She was so much more._**

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_Another party._

_Another party was being held in the humble abode of well, my home. _

_It was another party of glamour, luxury and pleasure._

_Not._

_It was just another party full of snobby rich aristocrats and high-class friends of my equally snobbish parents. . _

_It was also their excuse to introduce me to daughters of the rich and famous… hoping for my attention and appeal._

_Hell No. _

_Yes, I was born like a prince since I stepped my little feet onto the surface of the earth. I cannot say that I wish I wasn't, because then I would be lying. But, I can't help but wonder if there was anything more than all this shitty dullness I had at the moment. _

_It wasn't that the people here were ugly or unattractive or anything, they were fairly eye-catching actually, with all those layers and layers of make up and the expensive gowns, suits and bling bling._

_They were all the same though. It was odd but I have always wished to go to a normal public school, which is, of course impossible, due to me being Japanese and English, and unable to understand Cantonese. _

_But maybe, I could at least go to a more-normal English school, not like this snobby private school for the extremely rich, like I was going right now._

_I could not get up and dance, all the English classic songs had started to bore me immensely, and I couldn't stand listening to the same songs over and over again._

_Which is probably the main reason, I decided to go for a walk._

_I do not know why, but I had a strange appeal to go to the private forest garden. This was where lots of trees were planted… like our own personal forest. The trees towered over the garden, soaring higher than the house into the stars. _

_There was one tree. A tree that stood taller than the rest, and a tree that I had always climbed up when I needed to get away from everything, and just think._

_Sitting on the branch of that tree, I looked up to the stars. I just sat with no thought. _

_Suddenly, I heard a voice.  
The voice was singing._

_Singing with the most heavenly voice I have ever heard… So exotic and different… she was singing in Japanese, since Japan was my origin, I understood._

_It was so different to the repetitive English songs that I have heard so far, living in England since I was young, and only recently moving into my Hong Kong home, I have never really… heard much Japanese songs. _

_But her voice… was so enchanting. As if caught in a spell, I climbed back down the tree and walked around looking for the owner of this voice of heaven._

_A voice of an angel._

_The voice must have seen me, since as soon as I got down, the voice stopped. _

"_Hello?" I nervously mumbled. I heard rustling, and more rustling._

_A flower fell, and another, and another, and another. Until a whole cloud of flowers rained down on me._

_I looked up hesitantly._

"_Watch Out!" I heard in a fraction of a second, before I saw something falling towards me. I yelled and closed my eyes, a pain on my stomach._

_When I opened my eyes, I saw the most beautiful person in the world._

_No, she was not a person. It really _**was**_ an angel._

_I had nearly forgotten how to breathe, as I stood and just stared at the figure that was on top of me._

_I froze. _

_A long purple ribbon got loose and fell from her hair… and,_

_As soon as the ribbon fell, her flowing ebony hair was flying, covered with the shower of lily magnolias; it was long… long enough to be tickling my face as she and I were frozen in the lengths of time. _

_Her white dress was very simple… nothing like the extravagant gowns that were worn in the party, its silky pale fabric elegantly falling, covering her feet. Another longer purple ribbon was tied in her waist, as the rest of the fabric under it flowed down to the ground like a graceful river. _

_But what caught me off guard were her eyes. _

_Beautiful amethysts._

_Eyes I have never seen before, eyes that were so exotic and so full of… full of sorrow… _

_Eyes that looked so sad and so vulnerable that it took my breath away. _

"_Go-Gomen Nasai! Ano… I mean I'm so very sorry!" _

_I thought an angel fell from the sky…_

_And then, she disappeared, she ran off. _

_Just like that. _

_Leaving just a long string of purple ribbon on the ground. _

_She disappeared as fast as she had appeared…_

_And I never saw her again_

_I, Eriol Hiiragizawa, fell in love that night. _

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* * *

Lol sorry for not updating long. 

Remember last chapter was Saturday. And today's one is Sunday.

So next chapter would be school again.

Oh. And since many people wanted and were already expected and was planned.

There _is_ going to be another boy and another girl affecting Sakura and Syaoran's relationship.

Ciao :P

R&R please :D


	8. Chapter 8: Song of Promise :updated:

Helloo! There seemed to have been many likings and dislikings of the E and T pairing, but don't worry!

The E and T story was already written. I wont get sidetracked don't worry :D it was already written long ago. It will not continue much after this however. It is one of those side-stories that I just wanted to add to sprinkle the fairytale feel. So **Hope** don't worry sweetie.

**Yuehswind** thanks for your suggestion but I needed the random moments to just explain Syaoran's feelings before getting more into the plot. : ) thanks for the suggestion

**MisunderstO-od-child** – I'm sorry dearie. But it isn't Eriol and Tomoyo who affects their relationship. Cos well.. They have a relationship of their own. Haha. But thanks for the support 

**Lottie** – yes ive finaly come to lottieface. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH and you guys are going shopping tomorrow iin times square while im crammed in cram school :( :') have a good time. Angie will get all her equations right :D

**Eri** – hahah YES you get one too eriface. You know I was wondering what your Eriol fad was. And no wonder. Your name is close to Eriol's. SO DATS WHY YOU'VE GOT ERIOL ADDICTION! Zomg:')

**VvChick** – Yes sir :D I might be abit late in times. But its mostly to write longer chapters :D

**Syaoran101-** nono I love replying people XD cos cos I'm socha chatter rawwrr hehe but thanks! Wah! It would be scary if they were blood related. Blarggh hehhe

**Animefreakkagome** – Does weird dance together heheheeh XD thank you!

**AirStriker**- OMG I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE SAY "DUDE" wayyy to much too! Hahaahh XD Well you see. Theres this guy called Nick in my school and well … I hate him. :D

**kirei-mistress** – Thank you:D I willl try to improve my descriptions though. Although descriptions get hard in first person T.T

**bakaNeko18** – Thank you! I will try to update often!

**selina-m** – hehe im glad u liked Eriol's place! He's pretty much the prince charming aint he hahaha

**xxkrn-luvspellxx** – THANKYOU!for ur support :D Im Korean too ;D and loving kpop :D I also live in a foreign country as well :D hahehhe

**and everyone else who reviewed and read:D THANK YOU!**

* * *

Chapter 7

* * *

...

_Over the sea of reminiscence, to a village called memory, there lies my nostalgia._

We were practicing in our school choir, but our pianist was absent. Eriol had volunteered to play instead, everyone was surprised. Eriol didn't seem lik

e the piano-type.

But when we saw him play… he was definitely the piano-type. He seemed like… a different person… and then he suddenly got up and requested.

"May I request something?... Is it okay if I could duet with umm.. Tomoyo… Um. Daidouji. J-just for one song… Uh… Please?"

I have to say. I was dead surprised.

Me?

Nevertheless, through my surprise,

I sang.

_On your cheek, wet with rain,  
It smells like tears,  
You, the traveller with a kind face,  
_

The piano was fantastic. It blared, as I tried to sing with confidence, very aware of all the eyes of the choir that were on me. I could feel my cheeks turn red.

_It echoes silently...  
This nostalgic melody  
The forgotten memories...  
Let's awaken them_

I couldn't help but look at Eriol, he was playing the piano, with such a gentle yet powerful passion.

_This dream is the beginning  
Of a journey carried on small wings  
To the place where feelings disappear  
The two of us...  
Are crossing over the faraway sky and sea_

I couldn't help but wonder… why? Why had he wanted to duet with me? How did he even know how to play my favourite song? How did he even know my name?

_In the black of night  
I will shine  
You, who have such a kind face  
I miss you_

After the last note of the piano, everyone clapped and cheered, all I could do was awkwardly bow. I could definitely feel Eriol's eyes drilling a hole on me.

I nervously went back into my choir place and we continued on with our practice.

"_Um… excuse me. Is this your ribbon?" _

I turned around, and matched eyes with no other than _Eriol Hiiragizawa_ himself; the popular Japanese boy that only recently moved to South Island School from England. The one that hung around with Syaoran Li and the rest of the popular crowd… and he was holding my ribbon. It must have fallen off when I was singing. I didn't notice.

I didn't know why, but his eyes held a somewhat stunned feel as if he had just been struck with lightening. I was confused with his expression, and I stuttered, have I shocked him…?

I awkwardly thanked him and reached for the ribbon… "I'm-Eriol-Hiiragizawa-I'm-17-years-old-you-may-not-know-me-but-I-know-you-and-maybe-you-might-not-remember-but-i-saw-you-before"

I didn't get everything he said, but I had enough sense to realize he was introducing himself…

"Um. Hehe Hi… I'm.. er… Tomoyo Daidouji and… Yes… I've seen you before too." I said slowly and carefully, quite aware that his eyes were burning right through me.

As if, his mind had left, circled around the world and returned back to its rightful owner, he went back to his calm and collective self, and smiled. "Well… Tomoyo. You have no idea. Do you have time? I want to tell you a fairytale…"

I met my Prince Charming that day.

Fairytales really _do_ come true.

* * *

It was strange but somehow Syaoran seemed kind of… different. I could still remember those few years ago… those years where the only words that he had said to me … were words of hate and disgust.

I never knew why he hated me so much. What had I done to him? I never knew… and I still do not now.

Not long ago, but still quite long before… he tried to stay as far as possible to me in public. And so, since I arrived to his school he would always sit in the farthest seat possible to me, and stay in the farthest place away from me… and would avoid anything about me. At home… he would do the same, except often at times do nasty things to satisfy his loath. But I did not hate him. I guess… there would be times when I hated him… but when I think back, the reason, the person that had made me this strong to survive up till now. Was Syaoran himself.

Gradually, just like how our classroom seats got closer and closer so did his mind… and he was sometimes close enough for me to reach.

All the tears and pain of his that I never knew, understood or was told, but it didn't matter. What mattered was that we went through it together.

Syaoran would never think the way I'm thinking right now, but nevertheless Syaoran was not bad person… He was in pain, just like me.

Truthfully… I never really had time to cry or mourn over my family, and I don't think I wanted to… Crying with Syaoran and being there for him… was actually my own selfishness. Truthfully, _he_ was there for _me_ while I fooled myself to "helping" Syaoran when actually I was trying to ignore my own pains by helping another's pain.

This person, Syaoran, who had gone through all this with me.

Ironically…

Well.

He sits right behind me now.

And…

He is pulling my hair.

We were at English, the period of time where I pass notes with Tomoyo, and which we were chatting vigorously about the upcoming annual spring dance.

Amongst the scribbling of rough black ink on the small piece of paper, it said:

**_Saku! Anyways- ERIOL HIIRIGIZAWA talked to me! And he asked me to si-…um nvm! Um. Btw Honey. Syaoran's got your hair. Hehe xx_**

I didn't even notice that a huge strand of my hair was being held by no other than the great Syaoran, himself…'s fist- until Tomoyo had quite happily pointed it out. I really need to get used to the multiple-task thing that- most girls I know, are absolute _elites_ at- unlike me, who find multi-tasking one of life's immense challenges. _Extreme multi-tasking is definitely not one of my 108 secret magnificent skills._ (lol sorry. I just HAD to add that. I just love mokona from tsubasa chronicles xD)

"psst Syaoran. _Stop_ it." I hissed at him.

"No." …was the familiar dry answer.

That was just _him_ to answer that way. Syaoran is quite a human prototype of a dead. Leaf.

"_Stop_ It. You're going to get me in trouble." I hissed again at him, my face now slightly slanted to my left, a frown upon my face and my eyes trying to see the back of my head.

"Good."  
I know it was just a billionth of a second, but I could see a tiny bit of Syaoran's mouth slant upwards…strangely... all my annoyance faded in that billionth of a second, and even for just that billionth of a second, my heart jumped.

Something must be wrong with me.

* * *

(Syaoran pov)

_Love._

A hoax in life.

Where one believes and falls, where another deceives and shames.

…and still, after all that hopes for happiness…

And waits for it…

Till they realize they haven't got much life left.

I had believed love as a lie. Love was non-existent… and this 'love' had brought nothing but blood and bruises. No one could be happy.

_No one._

How can love be, when a wife leaves a man, for another man of money? How can love be, when a man leaves a woman for 10 other younger ones? How can love be, when a couple promises forever, a ring, a contract of love, yet, the ring is broken and thrown to sea… a bond broken and replaced with the contract of divorce?

How can love be, when a mother deserts the child, to live in a world full of betrayal… How can love be…

I had believed love as a lie. A ruse. As nothing.

I was wrong. It was so much more deadly.

Love was a disease. A curse, where the word of venom poisoned your blood, till your heart could not function properly… and till you're willing to be deceived.

No one could be happy…

I did not believe in love.

…

But since a time- I had felt happiness.

And then… I could feel those memories poison my blood…

And I was still happy.

I could finally at least hope for a love…

I was again a boy. A simple boy with a simple crush on a simple girl, though it may not seem very simple, Sakura being my **step**sister and all. Emphasize on the 'step'.

I was just that simple boy who drank the water, his crush drank. The simple boy who tried to like the thing his crush liked. A simple boy who wanted to ask his crush to the dance…

And that simple boy who was too scared and too chicken to.

I was just that simple boy, who felt like a grumpy dwarf, in love with the fair Snow White.

Nevertheless.

Still a boy.

…

Oh, and the boy who was pretty pissed off, when he saw the other blond boy holding Sakura's hand.

* * *

Sorry. That was all in a rush. I will do this chapter again .doushite doushite.. baka yaksok..

Gomen Nasai  
Gomen Nasai


	9. Chapter 9: Bad Hair Day :updated:

Hello! Yesss I started writing once again :X how did my exams go? I screwed up :( well sorry for the rubbish chapter last time (I did say I'll do it again) but hahaha maybe next time.

May I make something clear for people.

This is **not** a _light-hearted happy happy comedy love story_.

It is about difficult love. And the different kinds of love beyond another love. It's also about human kindness… and human cruelty. The genre of this story is not Comedy/Romance but it is Romance and DRAMA meaning a tale of LIFE.

A stepbrother and stepsister falling in love are not rare. It's very common actually. :)

syaoran101: Ahh Sorry. I did a rubbish chapter which I typed in just an hour :( not much time put in the last chapter gomen nasai! xD Haha very good spotting thanks for the advice ;D but- hehe let me explain. Before, sakura and Syaoran had much more close moments. But however, while Syaoran tried really hard to show his emotions through his doings, Sakura didn't notice anything nor did her heart thump to everything he did. (the bandages for example) – however the last chap was important because it showed when Syaoran didn't do anything except a mere "tiny tiny 1 billionth a second smile" her heart thumped for something so simple. It shows that Sakura is starting to feel something as well. So its quite important. It didn't go backwards don't worry- actually it went forward- forward to where Sakura feels something for something so small... but thanks for the advice anyways- I was aiming to make the story long but don't worry I think I should shorten it a bit heheheehe :D x take kare hon

SandPaper: hahah yeah its frustrating. But Sakura has to find out shes in love with HIM before she finds out hes in love with her. :)

Coca24cola : oooo loyal commenter. God bless yuuuuu xD

Reality Wish: Omg ME TOO "its like when u say over n over again wat ur gonna do and at the sec u go do it...u just chicken out" I DO THAT AHHH hahaha Btw I love your name XD

Musette Fujiwara : YAY! Ahhh I missed you the commenter since chapter 1 ;D IM so SORRY I havent updated long. Im sucha pig. Ruby deserves to be slapped –slaps self-

selina-m : I shall tryyy to update faster hehehe –off to bathroom-

SmiLe Of PuRe : hahah thank you ;D thanks for revieiwing!

Icyblossom : Hai:D! thanks for reviewing!

Oh dear Finally its t3h LOT : zomg :O I hope you feel better lottie :') and I don't know when I'll post this so probably when I do you'll be completely coldless. Which is t3h good :D!

And Eri : Eri-poo lisetnign to your percussion thing and Fantasia thing hehehe XD as I write this. Its on repeat :O

crazypicciloplayer014 : thank you for reviewing! xD

Kimura : Ahahah Sorry- the last chapter was actually mainly on Eriol's part, and I needed a start in the event. Tis still a bit eventless. But Sakura's getting a peek of Syaoran's feelings :D Thx for reviewing dear :D

Ffgirl-07 : Hehehe EEllooo there! I will update as ssoooon as I can! Thx for reviewing!

Margaret: hahah Hello! I don think I've read your review before. But HELLO THERE! Im angie :D. I shall put more fluff its coming up. Sorry I have the whole story in my mind but they are into fragments :T that's why its very eventless at times- ooo and thanks for telling your friends about it too :') I'd be very grateful. I shall finish it! I have an end in my head. I think. Heheheheh anyways nice to meeettt chuuuu :D! x

Ow. I just pressed my bruised left hand onto a sharp edge of the desk. Ow.

Ow Ow Ow.

…

Ow.

Lol. And Errr :P Yes. Finallancioooo Sakura gets a peek of Syaoran's feelings. :O!

* * *

Chapter 9  
Bad hair day

* * *

_**ANNUAL SPRING DANCE**_

**Grade 9-13  
6:00 – 11:30  
$20 a ticket**

The Annual Spring Dance…

I had avoided going to this dance since 3 years ago, when I was about… only thirteen- being grade 9, and the first time to the annual dance, I had been very excited. This was probably because I had had my first date then… my first dance, and I had an older very cute date!

A very good date.

His name was Daniel Slater…One of my first crushes he was… blond hair, fair skinned with those bright bright blue eyes… and those white white teeth… Imagine my shock, when someone like _him_, asked someone like _me_ out for the spring dance. I felt like a princess from a storybook once again.

… My first night in a Hong Kong Spring Dance… with my first date in my whole life… was completely ruined- and I've avoided Daniel Slater and the Spring Dance since. Of course, there's always an evil villain in every fairytale.

**

* * *

**

It was the night before the night of the dance, and I spent 3 hours… deciding my hair. I was going to make sure I looked my very best. I didn't have much nice clothes- I was still given a few pocket money to spend, which I spent mostly on schoolbooks and stationary- none on clothes. Tomoyo, being well… _Her_, had guaranteed that she would find the best outfit for me.

And she did.

The top was a beautiful white blouse that was made like a short dress. In the middle, just under my chest, a long pink ribbon was tied around. A small embroidery of a cherry blossom clung like an appliqué in the left bottom of the long blouse.

It was sleeveless, except the lace that contoured around the sleeves and ends of the blouse. Along with the blouse, she had also gotten me a cute pink tartan mini-skirt that matched the concept perfectly.

Unfortunately, at that time, Tomoyo couldn't attend the Spring Dance, she was going away somewhere in the New Territories, far far away from Hong Kong Island where the Spring Dance was held.

She said that she had another party to attend _"another boring business party of my mom's hosted by some English-Japanese rich family people"_

(lol. Check out the last two chapters- that's the party shes talking about… the one hosted by Eriol)

I laid down my whole outfit on my table, grinning in satisfaction, and through my all-smiles, I went to sleep.

The alarm clock rung, the sky was still dark. My alarm clock woke me up in the wrong time! _That's a bad omen._  
I woke up, feeling a strange heavy feeling- somehow, when I had stood up, things felt light. Way _too_ light.

**Something was wrong.**

The strange fast beating of my heart, quickening its pace, every step I walked from the bed, as I slowly treaded towards the desk… where my outfit… _lay?_

My blouse and skirt was dumped on the floor, and tattered on the floor. In shock, I lifted my blouse… the ribbons, the lace… spread all over the floor- separate with the rest of the fabric. The rest of the blouse was ripped in half, right across the middle. Ditto the skirt.

Who could have done this?

In frantic, my body shook. Through my disbelief, hair fell.

One hair by hair, fell from the sky.

For a few second I thought- 'What. NOW I HAVE CANCER! OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO DIE' – but I realized that the hair was falling in strands now, and I knew my hair had been purposely cut.

Now completely in shock, I ran towards the mirror that hung behind the door. My hair…

My hair was cut all the way way way above my ears. Like a long buzz cut. I looked like a boy. No. Uglier than a boy.

I screamed.

Running out of my room, in complete insanity- I caught sight of Syaoran casually walking by, with the normal glare evident on his face.

Well, 'A normal glare evident on his face' Syaoran, with a _pair of scissors_, with strands of my hair stuck in between.

_Syaoran… Li…._

**

* * *

**

Those things, Syaoran had done much worse, yet that particular memory still clung. As a 13 year old teenage girl, the spring annual dance… lipgloss and Daniel Slater was more important than anything.

I could remember the whispers and sneers, the teasing and the laughing- and Daniel Slater, who, expected, did not want me in his presence. Sakura Li, with the hand-me-down sweater and tattered jeans… me, who looked like a boy. I didn't have enough money then, to have my randomly cut hair done properly.

So I lived with it.

My auburn hair now, is about shoulder length, some parts of my hair longer than the other- due to Syaoran's scissor attacks. (Really. A lot of Asians have real auburn hair :) I have a japanese friend called Yuu and a chinese friend called Amanda :D that has natural auburn hair! amazing :D)

My hair, in a… quite weird way turned out quite okay when it got longer. Apparentely, Syaoran- not intended, (indeed) had not known that he had cut my hair quite professionally. So when it had grown, it curled perfectly, two longer strands coming in the sides of my hair naturally.

(check out Sakura's hairstyle in CCS and Tsubasa. Tis very random lengths, yet so pretty shes soo cute )

**

* * *

**

While I was too busy sitting on my desk, pondering into the past, I didn't notice the tall figure that was shading me in its shadow. Before I could lift my head to face the owner of the shadow, my hands were being held firmly, by the hand of the owner of the shadow.

I looked up.

There he was. Daniel Slater, himself. Daniel Slater was right in front of me. And he was holding my hand.

My head bowed as fast as it had gone up, and I felt my face burn up.

_Daniel Slater is in front of me._

_And he is holding my hand._

_Daniel Slater is in front of me.  
And he is holding my hand._

_Daniel-_

"Hey. Sakura… Uh… r'member me…? Daniel. " Daniel Slater's hands (?) said.

The familiar British accent was still present- and I felt the flush of my cheeks spread all over my body till the tip of my fingers.

"…" I did not say anything. I couldn't. I couldn't say anything.

Nothing came out. Instead, I slowly retrieved my hand away… Slater held my hand tighter.

"Uh. Sakura- You know the annual spring dance---" I felt my heart beat, as I heard those words. He was going to ask me to the spring dance. Daniel Slater is asking me to the spring dance. Again!

But before Daniel could finish his words, another hand from my left had grabbed my wrist. "Let go."

Syaoran's voice ringed into my ear.

Shocked, I froze. All I could do was stare at my own hands… which apparently, were held _very_ firmly by two boys. I could feel everyone's eyes on us… and all I could do was stupidly just stare, frozen.

"Let go of her hand." Syaoran repeated, his voice icing the whole room.

I couldn't bring myself to face Syaoran…

What was happening?

_I don't understand. _

I slowly lifted my head up to Daniel, avoiding Syaoran's face; Why couldn't I face Syaoran?

Daniel's was facing Syaoran, and his face shocked with fear. Well… I guess it must have been shocking for the cold quiet Syaoran to suddenly throwing ice daggers with his tone.

"I said. Fuckin' let go of her hand."

And with that Syaoran pulled Daniel's hand away (quite easily I will add); and holding my wrist, he roughly pulled me up.

Syaoran, now holding my wrist so tightly (that it burnt) dragged me quite roughly through the door, out of the classroom.

"Sy-Syaoran…? What What are you DOING! let me go-" Syaoran ignored me, and continued walking. his hands literally slitting my wrists. "SYAORAN! I SAID LET ME GO!" with that, Syaoran finally looked back.

His expression was very scary :(

-and my mouth quickly shut up.

Now in an empty classroom Syaoran pulled me in, and fell exhaustingly to the ground.

Not knowing what to do, I just stood there and watched him. Syaoran, his eyes hidden under his hair, "Your such an idiot. You know that? Don't you have any pride? You were about to say yes to the friggin dude who you supposingly went with in your last spring dance. The one that dumped you as soon as he saw you. The dude who fuckin' called you a hag right in front of everyone." By then, his eyes were directed at me.

I stared back at him blankly with dotted eyes for a few seconds, until my mind and anger came back. "Oh you mean the guy who dumped me BECAUSE OF YOU?"

Hearing that, Syaoran's eyes drooped under his messy hair once again. After about a minute of silence, Syaoran got up, and walked towards me.

As he walked towards me, I walked hesitantly back, until my back was on a wall.  
I closed my eyes, as I felt Syaoran's shadow closing in..

When I opened them, he had his arms cornering me, and he leaned down to face me. The same icey coldness velveted in his eyes. _Your eyes always seem to freeze me._ And once again, my heart was beating so violently that I was afraid of passing out from a heart attack. Was this fear? No, it was something else.

His face got nearer and nearer, until all I could hear was his silent steady breathing and the loud beating of my about-to-get-a-heart-attack heart. His eyes were icey; yet, the body heat radiating from his presence was alarmingly warm. He leaned down to face me directly as if to kiss me. I was completly frozen, my brain refused to evaluate the situation. Well that is until, well, until it did.

Wait Wait Wait, WHAAAAAT?

K..K...K...KISS?!?!?!?!!

* * *

:) okay. now starting on a new chapter : D first time in a year. hohoho. 


	10. Chapter 10: Haven

Phinnie here :D!!! HAH! FINALLY A NEW 10TH CHAPTER. : D 1337 yaaaah? Muhahhaah. Sorry. I've run off for a year and I'm back writing shtuff. :D Hopefully I can get this chapter quite long.

I know I know that it feels as if the relationship between Syaoran and Sakura is going quite slowly. It's not actually. Because it has already started. Because this story is not about a girl and a boy falling in love in an instant, its about a boy and girl caring and supporting each other, and gradually falling in love after many years and years pass. And the years have already passed so we have to look back at them don't we heheheh. :D But it feels good that you guys wish for them to get together fast. Although technically they're already sort of together hehehehe.

And plus, you can tell how much he's open to her now. They are close enough to tease each other, to worry about each other and to help each other out.

oh things to add things to add.. I've made a few changes in my story, and you guys have to go re-read the end of chapter 9 since I changed it lawls.

**Also a few changes in the story,**

**- Sakura is known as a "cursed child" (please go re-read it fast :( it'll be more help for me if I don't have to explain it)  
- Mr Li loathes Sakura as she was most people's blame to her mother's death.  
- There are many secrets in the story that not even the actual characters themselves know about: but they will be brought up as the story progresses. **

**There is other important stuff that hasn't been covered yet. For example: the relationship between Mr Li, Nadeshiko and Yelan. **

I was going to write replies back to all the nice reviewers who are very very nice: but yeah, I'll do it next chapter since there is utterly too much to write and so little time!

**To All reviewers (Especially the ones who sent me PMs) : I previously wrote a lot on this part of my chapter, but now that I read it, it sounds like a whole lot of excuses in my part, I don't deserve to say anything : ( I'm sorry for not updating for so long, and thank you for supporting me ;: -hearts- honto honto honto daisuki desu T-T  
**

Ive read all of the reviews : D every single one of them. But I'll just write comments to the latest ones hahah sorry –heart-

Musette Fujiwara – oh wowowoww thank you for the countless amounts of reviews and support and opinions! HOW DO YOU DO? Hahahah

SailorCSH – hahaha thank you for re-reading! I did ask everyone to but I thought no one would (ive changed so much on the story !) and I'm not really exactly sure if step-brother and step-sister relationships are common, but yes, in fiction there are very many lots. (I used to have a crush on my cousin. Strange huh?) Oh and I didn't notice my chapter 4 was deleted until you told me, Thank you!

HushedFury – Thank you! I've been studying hard. This year is the most important, but I'll start writing anyways. Practice for English XDDDD

As always, CCS does not belong to me, nor Komomo. _Although we wish very much so._

_on with the story_

_... SPACE WASTING._

* * *

Chapter 10: Haven

* * *

His face got nearer and nearer; close enough that I could not move a muscle, close enough to hear his own heart racing in level with mine. 

In shock, all I could do was stare. My body and mind were not in tune: My brain was panicking; it was screaming _'WHA WHA WHAAAT!!!'_ ….but my body kept as still as a statue.

I stood there gawking.

His face got closer and closer… and closer… I could feel his body heat. Abnormal body heat. His body was alarmingly warm… no, actually… it seemed as if it was downright steaming! Was it my imagination being in such a situation? Was it the temperature of the stuffy room? Or was his body radiating so much heat that I could just imagine him melting like a piece of chocolate in the microwave?

His cold dazed eyes were spiritless and bottomless; it seemed as if he could not see direction, no figure. Despite this, his body temperature, whether from my own franticness… seemed to be severely heating up… and I mean _severely_. His face continued to get closer and closer…Until….

………..Until his body completely collapsed heavily onto my shoulder, his burning fever scarring my skin.

"Syaoran are you okay…?... Syaoran?? SYAORAN!!!!"

There was no reply.

* * *

A teacher and a student ran into the room, clearly due to Sakura's outburst; and with one look at a collapsed Syaoran and a panicking Sakura, the teacher calmly and in undoubted seriousness informed the latter prefect-student to call an ambulance.  
"CALL AN AMBULANCE! A STUDENT HAS COLLASPED." 

The crowding, the Oh,my,god,What,happened's and the blur of colours droned into the background as Sakura's mind blanked with vacant fear.

* * *

**(Syaoran's POV)**

I woke.

The birds were _not_ singing a crappy song, the sun was _not_ blazing and the annoying kids were _not_ taking their noisy dogs for a walk. .. There was not a single sound at all.

…. Yet, I still had a huge headache.

In my groggily state, my senses could only hear the faint beating of my heart, see the white blur of my surroundings and feel the intractable pain that seemed to haunt the back of my skull: as if an invisible hammer was hammering a nail to the walls of my brains.

As I heavily forced my eyes wider, the blurry vision secured into a white background- My surroundings were completely white. My first thought was: 'Have I died?'

I could feel the coolness of the white sheets under my fingers and when my senses had briefly secured, I could smell the lingering scent of my surroundings. I tried to calm my hammering mind. This familiar and sickening smell… smelt of a hospital.

… Why the hell am I at a hospital?

I couldn't remember anything. All I could remember was the disturbingly-infected-looking scrambled eggs that I ate that morning.

I tried to get up.

It was near impossible, my body was completely contradicting to my brain's orders. It seemed as if my body weight has had increased by a ton or replaced by a truck of lead. For a few minutes, I had forgotten how to walk.

_Is this what they call paralysis? _

I opened my eyes wider to get a more focused vision of my surroundings, I looked about; I saw no-one. My hearing however, had secured; I could hear a light breathing. I lazily looked slightly to the right. There, on the side of my bed, a little Sakura was fast asleep with her arms on the bed that I lay, and her head pillowed in her thin arms (like an angel ..). I stood there staring.

How…cute.

I weakly moved my hand over to her hair, clenching my fist slightly; I grabbed an amount of her natural honey-brown hair. She really had nice hair, very soft. She always smelt the same everyday, a flowery scent, something foreign, something special. After a few moments, Sakura's head twitched a little. I removed my hand right away.

(Sakura POV)

The rustling of the bed awoke me. _Did Syaoran wake up?_ "Sya…roooon…?" I called his name in a croaky groggily voice. In reply, the blurry figure in my eyesight grunted back.

_Syaoran was awake._

As if lightening had suddenly struck my brain with surging energy-. My eyes widened instantly and I bolted up and screamed. "SYAORAN!!!!"

Syaoran stared blankly at the That's-right-I-totally-just-screamed-your-name Sakura. (Probably too tired to bother asking or reacting to my scream) I blushed- _I am so embarrassing, Even __I__ wouldn't want to be with someone like me…_

"Sya-Sya-Syaoran you've woken! Um Uh Eh I'll-I'll go call the doctors" I muttered as I shuffled left and right, wondering where the door was; my just-woken-up sanity was still a little wonky. I looked over at Syaoran, checking his comfort levels; our eyes matched. As usual, his petrifying eyes bore through mine. It always felt that way… Every time our eyes matched, it always felt as if I could not breathe for a couple of seconds, as if I was drowning in his gaze.

I could not help thinking about how close Syaoran was to me last afternoon, quite flustered; I turned my heel towards the door to look for a nurse.

Three nurses came into the room to take care of his medicine and temperature. I walked out of the room and through the hospital corridors, looking for a drink machine. I really needed some water right now; I had been next to Syaoran for the whole day yesterday, worried sick and eventually falling asleep at his side.

As I walked about, thoughts and memories zoomed rapidly into my mind altogether, like a bunch of hungry tigers caged away from the food. As I had not had time to think about anything else properly except for Syaoran's health since yesterday.

I was deep in thought.

Hospital corridors are good places to think, as everything is white and the floor is so clean that you don't have to worry about stepping on a piece of gum…

(Yes, I totally was deep in thought about stepping on gum.)

Okay seriously: Syaoran had a fever of over 40 degrees: A dangerously burning temperature. How did he put up with such a temperature with a cold poker face through the whole day? It really was incredulous…in a sort of, sad way. Was his pride to stay strong, cold enough to keep him surviving amongst such high temperatures, and for that long?

Yesterday, As Syaoran was wheeled into the ambulance; I had thought I had gone insane. I felt as if the world was crashing down on me. It felt as if the pieces of the skies were crumbling into sharp shards of glass, taunting to take Syaoran away. The expression on Syaoran's face as he lost conscience… an expression of extreme pain and suffocation, it really…broke my heart.

My fear for him was so intense, so desperate. The very thought of him in extreme pain, blew a time bomb in my mind.

When, had Syaoran become such an important person of my life? When had he become someone so precious? Well… I had always thought Syaoran as my worst enemy and the spawn of Satan himself… yet, why does my fingers tremble with fear, and why does my heart ache in the very thought of Syaoran hurt? Since when, had he been such a big part of my world… and my heart…?

_I could not let Syaoran leave me._

Was I afraid… just like then, losing someone special to me?

* * *

**Syaoran POV **

After all the medications and the rest of the annoying "Mister-Li-Please-Take-care-of-your-body-and-inform-if-you-are-unwell"s from the nurses….

Sakura sneaked in.

_Thank God, Sakura, Please save me and scare these people away with your clumsiness. They are pissing me off. I want to kick them but I can't make a fuss since I have to make a good impression for my name, and you don't since something like you don't matter in society anyways. _

I stared hard at Sakura hard enough with my very-well-known hypnotic eyes, hopefully expecting her to read my mind.

She looked flustered when she met my (super hypnotic) eyesight, but as if she had understood, she politely asked the nurse for the tray of hospital food, that one of the nurses had been holding. The nurses murmured a few things to Sakura, who answered as "I understand, I will." and all of them silently (and thankfully no doubt) left the room.

Sakura and I were then alone, staring at the tray; she did not move a muscle. "Well…? Are you going to make me starve?" I ushered her in exhaustion. Sakura went red.

She meekly took one step forward and stopped, her face flushed again. I could feel a vein popping in the back of my (already) painful skull. It felt as if my blood pressure tunneled downwards, my mood faltered. I stared expressionlessly at her. "By the time you get here, I would already be a corpse, starved to death in a _hospital_. It'll be in the papers, and this place will stop having patients due to rumours of it being an unfair hospital that killed a patient because one dumb helper refused to provide any food. Hurry up dumbass, I want to eat the food, not you idiot. I'm not in the mood right now… so get here." I said all this quickly, in a tired toneless voice, dripping with sarcasm. (My headache did not help.)

'For someone who slept so very comfortably next to me, seems to have a very big problem with my presence now.'

As if my words had calmed her, Sakura quickly moved beside my bed, well, after _nearly_ tripping over herself on the flat ground _(how is that possible?!)_ and _nearly_ letting go of the tray (which she didn't). She placed the tray in front of me and sat there staring at her hands.

I stared wryly at my food. How disgusting it looked.

Hospital food was never good. _Cheap commoner food._

I picked up the spoon with my brittle phalanges, my forearm ached and my fingers started to shake, until my muscles betrayed me. My spoon fell with a resounding 'CLANG'. Surprised, Sakura jumped a little and quickly looked up, and stared at my hand with her large curious eyes. Then, she slowly smiled; a strange smile that seemed more thankful than sympathetic. She suddenly grabbed my fingers and gently laid them down.

_I feel like a loser._

I glanced at Sakura's beaming face.

_Or not._

Sakura picked up the spoon, and scooped up a bit of the steaming soup, she blew the steam off the soup (as it was too hot anyways.) and laying a hand under the spoon, reached up to my mouth and said "Syaoran Say Ahhhh" I swear, I thought I saw stars in her cheerful eyes.

I raised an eyebrow; I was too tired to react. _Was feeding me that joyful?_ Somehow… this situation seemed very familiar to me, as if it had happened before. Nevertheless, I awkwardly opened my mouth, and drank the soup down. For some reason, it was very tasty…

I glanced sideways at Sakura; her large green eyes intently goggled back at me, as if expecting an answer. "Well… Gimme more." I answered.

I felt more like a loser, but it seemed to have made her incredibly happy as she broke up the bread and dipped the bread into the soup and hung it in front of my mouth. (Sakura also knows that I like it when bread is dipped into soup.)

After more of her Let's-feed-syaoran-game, she carefully sat still again and looked at her hands once more.

"… Ne Syaoran, ano…. Do you remember? I .. don't think you do, but, but I do!!... Errr. Yeah… Remember, when we were younger… you were sick with a fever before, and I fed you like this…" she trailed off and went very red.

_Has Sakura gotten my fever? Why the hell does she keep turning red?! It's annoying and it's starting to worry me._

I could tell she really wanted to say something. You see, Sakura has a habit of saying "ne Syaoran, ano…" in the start of a sentence every time she had something she wanted to say. (It's a Japanese thing apparently)

I grunted in reply.

* * *

_**(4 years ago… Right after the "rain incident" in chapter 6, Syaoran POV)**_

_I woke. _

_The rays of sunshine were creeping through the gaps between the curtains, creating straight lines of light, striping across my face; I forced my eyes to open. _

_I hate mornings._

_Where am I? _

_I scrunched my eyes together, I tried to secure my vision, but the world was spinning and my eyes stayed stiff. All I could see was the bed I was lying on, and my body. _

_... This was not my bed. My bed was not so tiny, not made of cheap rusty wood… and certainly did not have such cheap commoner sheets. _

_When my vision had briefly secured, I looked around. This was definitely not my room. The surroundings were bleak and messy. Books and random cloths (that I don't even want to specify how dirty they looked) were spilled across the floor. _

_The door opened. Someone was coming this way. I could hear the light footsteps… left right left right… So light, like a feather. Who was it? And What did it want from me? _

_My vision was blurry. All I could see was a blurry image of a … small girl. She was walking closer towards the bed. I closed my eyes again and pretended to be asleep. _

_Suddenly, I felt something incredibly cool surged on top of my forehead. My eyes opened instantly and my body jumped a little, Taken back from the sudden icey-cold white cloth that was placed on my head. Was this person trying to poison me?_

_I raised my fist for self defense, and drastically faced towards my opponent. …but All I saw were two huge green eyes looking surprised back at me._

"_Oh you're awake!" a familiar voice ringed into my ears. _

_Sakura? _

_Suddenly all the memories of last night flashed back at me, the rain, the umbrella, the shouting and those warm hands. Sakura's hands. _

_What had happened after that rain? I remember walking through the rain holding her hand… and the rest was blank._

"_Syao.. Syaoran, do you remember? You blacked out in front of the backdoor. So I carried you here. I'm sorry I was going to take you to your room but housekeeper-san was in the corridors and and and you didn't, I mean you don't want them to know right?"_

_I gave a tired half-nod, trying to avoid eye-contact. I could not stand my pride being crushed. What if she was laughing inside, because of what she saw yesterday? I looked at her hands. She was holding something. Something that smelt good. On her hands was a tray with a bowl of hot soup, a glass of water and a piece of bread. _

"_Oh, and its Sunday today, so everyone thinks your still asleep in your bed. They're all out too. I'm sorry… my room is so shabby isn't it? But but the bed is really really clean, like really really really clean I promise. Really."_

_The amount of "really"s was making me nervous. Was this bed really clean?! _

"_You need to eat something before you have any medicine. Or you'll have a big big stomach ache. And that won't be very nice." Sakura smiled._

_I did not answer; I lied there staring at her. Suddenly I felt my face get hotter and hotter. This fever was very strange. All the heat in my body seemed to have gathered onto my face. I felt sick._

_Sakura sat next to me, the tray on her lap._

_Why was she not asking me anything about yesterday? Surely she'd have something to blackmail me about after seeing me so useless yesterday night… _

"_Syaoran"_

_Oh, here it comes._

_I glared at her. "..what?" I curtly replied, ready for any accusations. _

_She said, a little taken back from my sudden-energy. "Sya…Syaoran you'll have to sit up a little, you'll choke if you eat when you're lying down.."_

_I stood there confused and then surprised; it was completely not what I was ready for. I reluctantly sat up. _

_With her right hand she reached into her pocket. "I also bought these. They're medicine I got from the local pharmacy. Sorry, I ran out of my money so I used a little of the grocery cash.. I hope that's okay… what should I say to Mrs HouseKeeper-san… Do you think she'll be mad?... Oh nooo I think she'll be mad…"_

_  
Sakura continued to mutter and talk to herself in a superbly inhuman speed. I watched her quite clueless of what to do. My stomach rumbled. _

_As if her senses returned, she yelped and remembered the food. "Aiya!" She picked up the spoon. _

"_Ehhh the soup is way too hot." Sakura scooped a bit of the soup, and blew away the steam coming out of the spoon of soup. I do not remember the last time anyone had ever done that. Syaoran say "AHHH". I stared at her blankly. Was this woman crazy? I do not AHH._

… _Nevertheless, as if she had somehow controlled my body, my mouth automatically opened with a sullen "Ah.". _

_Sakura was surprised and she smiled again. This time a twice bigger smile. _

…_.and my face got twice hotter. _

_This fever had made me a little crazy too. _

_One hand holding the spoon, the other under the spoon, she lifted the soup up to my lips. I drank in the warm soup. It was delicious. I had eaten so many different kinds of sophisticated and rich soups in my past. But this soup, this simple creamy soup was the best soup I had ever had. The warmest and most comforting. _

"_Sorry Syaoran, I couldn't find any good ingredients, so I just bought some Campbell soup from the local store and this bread is from my breakfast. I wanted to make something without being suspicious. I felt like a secret agent!" _

_She giggled, but those sympathetic eyes still stuck. I did not understand. Why was she saying sorry when she had given me her breakfast, risked herself to buy me medicine and cooked me the most tastiest soup I've ever had? Why did I even care?_

_I do not know. _

_Yet those eyes, those eyes I hated so much, seemed so big and… and green. Mesmerizing? What a gross word, but that was all I could think about. _

"_This bread is sort of stale and hard. It was cold when I came back so I reheated it in the oven, but it turned even harder!! But but but it tastes really really good if you put hard bread into soup. Like really really really good. So… Ummm.." Sakura's eyes moved side to side. _

_She ripped the bread into two, and then into fourths, and then into small eighths. I did not really feel like chewing anything but Sakura seemed so into-it, I just waited. Finally she dipped the bread into the soup and lifted the bread near my mouth. She looked at me expectantly. Once again her eyes automatically made my mouth open wide. She put the piece of hard bread into my mouth, but as she did, a little bit of her finger touched my lips. _

_I did not know what happened but it felt as if the world temperature had globally increased by a huge amount. (OH NOES, GLOBAL WARMING oDo!!!.) My heart was beating incredibly fast. What was wrong with me?? _

_Aside from that, the bread was absolutely delicious. It was amazing how such an old and rusty-like bread could turn out so… happy. _

_She looked very happy. "How is it? It's good right?"_

_I grunted in reply. She really was very happy._

_After the meal was finished, she opened the packets of medicine. By this time, my energy had restored and she quietly stood up and with the tray in hand she walked towards the door. She had left a glass of water and the medicine in the small lamp-table next to me. _

_Down Down Down the medicine went… my mouth to my throat, and the sickening feeling of cold cold water rushing down my intestines. She came back. This time with a basin of cold ice water and a separate small wet towel, ice shimmering and gushing as they hit the side of the basin. Click Clack Clack. She placed it next to the bed, on the floor. She dipped the towel into the water. Closh Closh Closh, and squeezed the excess water out of the towel. Ushering me to lie down, she put the towel onto my face starting from my cheeks and upwards towards my forehead and eyelids.. "My mom used to do this for me when I was younger. It always felt good when you had a fever." Sakura said quietly._

_It felt good._

_My heart pounded. It kept pounding. My face felt hotter, yet cooler from the towel. But as my heart raced, my face felt so much more hotter. It made me dizzy._

_I looked out the window._

_A rainbow. _

_The rain was gone. And after the rain there was only peace. The birds were singing again, I do not like birds who sing, but for this one moment, I forgave them. _

_After I had enough energy to return to my room, I felt it, her scent. Her scent lingered around my body, like a mount of fragranced wax. _

_It disappeared after a while. The strange feeling, that very feeling of wanting that scent of hers to shimmer around me just a little longer, that feeling of security, once again I could not comprehend._

* * *

(Back to the present) 

When I had awoken from my daydreaming, my reminiscence of the past, I finally noticed. Whilst Sakura had been scooping spoonfuls of soup towards my mouth, her smile had disappeared, and had been replaced by a thin line. Her eyes, her beautiful eyes stayed glassy, but the happiness was not there, it was replaced with something cold, something unexplainable.

I was very surprised. "Uh.. Uh… W..What's wrong??" I asked her in awkward disclosure.

She said something in a low whisper, a muffled quiet voice, I could not hear what she said . She did not look at me in the eye. I frowned. What has she done now? What was she guilty for? I really wondered, thousands of explanations ran through my head, I rummaged for which one was at truce. "Wha…t?" I asked her, staring at her dumbly.

"I I mean, maybe, what if, my… my existence has always been a curse. My father, my brother, my mother they all had left me. I am a curse. And… and last time and this time, you got sick when you were with me… What if…." She droned quieter and quieter, deep into thoughts.

I did not expect that. Had Sakura been thinking about this the whole time? My health had nothing to do with her. I had been sick from days before, I had just happened to have given up holding it in when Sakura had been in front of me. Probably because Sakura was the only person in the world who I could trust to see me break down.

"What are you saying. Dumbass. Ugly. Idiot. This is my business. Has nothing to do with you. Chizi."

How much had the world compressed onto her, to make her, herself, to believe she was really a curse?

Hearing this, she moved her eyes to match mine, she was surprised. The ends of her mouth twitched, as if aching to smile. She laughed. A melodic laugh it was, as if that the moment a few seconds earlier, was non-existant, had never happened.

But even in her relief, I still saw that small glint in her eyes, that small glint of melancholy that could not be hidden by her laughter.

The hospital room was warm. The hospital bed was comfortable, and the food felt fresh (despite how it looked). But even so, it could not compete with the warmth and security that a small rusty bed and Campbell soup had given me so many years ago. Her scent still lingers.

I was happy.

* * *

AHhhh This whole aim of this chapter is sort of a look-in to Syaoran's thoughts. His thoughts made him feel more human. Take note that even though he says it so naturally, so humanly, in the outside he is not saying at all, no expressions, no sadness, no happiness, just nothing. 

WELL.

That's that. Probably the longest chapter ive ever done. Nearly 5000 words. : D wholly wow.

Ciao


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